Marie Elaina is an old high school friend. She was super cool then, and still is. She exuded coolness and continues to be hip without even trying!

Back in those days, I’d like to think we were a bit alike – or we wouldn’t have become friends. Of course, I lacked the coolness factor, the beauty and the confidence, but I’m sure we had some similarities. We shared one shameful similarity for certain. Unfortunately, we were both attracted to losers. Or, should I say, drawn in by losers? Yes, that is more accurate!

Another similarity, with an equal and opposite reaction, we both had sons who lit up our lives! Our sons became our North Stars. These boys filled our lives with pride and purpose. We poured all we had into them.

Today we reap the rewards of our concerted efforts. We surpassed the odds, and rose above statistics. As single-Moms, surrounded by loserly ‘men’ we successfully raised strong, educated, respectful, sons. We raised our boys to have ambition, integrity, and respect for women. We did it, and we did it exceptionally well!

Marie Elaina, “My son’s father just walked out and never looked back. I made sure my son knew none of it was about him. Being left, did not define his value. It was about his father’s capacity to love, and not about anything he lacked or deserved.

I secretly feel his father’s abandonment shaped him into the strong, determined, dedicated man he has become. Maybe it wasn’t the easiest way to be shown how to be a man, but it was what he was given.Tip #7

I agree. I also feel Michael’s paternal abandonment shaped him for the better. Through attempted explanations and ongoing conversation, at an early age Michael began to learn the qualities of a man, a father. The teachable moments allowed him to quickly formulate what kind of person he wanted to be.

Michael learned the value of responsibility, and the pain of irresponsibility. Of course, I too can think of easier ways to demonstrate such lessons; however, maybe none as powerful!

These days, I’m proud to say, I think Marie Elaina and I are even more alike. We both enjoy motorbikes, love greasy biker dudes, and dream of being Gypsies. We live deliberately, appreciate our lives, and love to travel.

Our strongest commonality is, we shine at any image, a mere mention, or even the softest reminder of the young men we’ve raised! We beam with pride!

Marie Elaina’s sums it up for us both when she says, “I now enjoy the greatness of a man I’m privileged to call my son.”

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Next week, Donna on learning disabilities.


  • Doreen Coady

    Author & Parenting Commentator

    Author of 100 Moms 1000 Tips 1 Million Reasons & 100 Dads 1000 Tips 1Million Reasons available on Amazon and major book stores.   Doreen is empty-nester who has spent the last five years collecting tips from 199 parents. Her heartwarming and real-talk, message on parenting is woven through their collective wishes and wisdom.   Parents are diverse in terms of age, culture, social-economic background, and beliefs. Contributions provide 2000 parenting tips from others interested in helping each other, especially new parents learning the ropes.   Every tip and commentary is distinct, providing a magnificent assortment of shared experiences. The collection conveys the depth, devotion, and breadth of parenting.   This is fun, enlightening, easy to read, and a highly relatable account of parenting successes and struggles.   For ‘the why,’ check out,, or search “100 Moms 1000 Tips” on Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram.