Sherrylee, “Remember your child didn’t ask to be born, and your child didn’t ask to be born with a disability. Don’t treat your child like they are the root of all your problems. Your child is struggling and you need to understand, they don’t want to be this way.  Accept and love them. Help them to learn to live with the disability they have. Teach them they are a very worthy human being.Tip #9

Sherrylee’s comment in tip #9, “Don’t treat your child as the root of all your problems.” really resonated with me.  Prior to Michael’s disability, in the early years, it’s tough for me to admit, I felt as if Michael was the root of my problems.

I remember confiding to my therapist, “I’m trapped! I’m stuck with a baby.”  I really was focused on all the pressure he was bringing to my life. I shamefully recall moments, a time, in which I did see my sweet little boy as the root, and the reason, for my problems.

My therapist responded, “You are in no way stuck.  There are many options.” She proceeded to list those options for me.  She mentioned, contacting Children’s Aid, adoption, re-assigning custody, finding respite, even running away – complete abandonment.  She explained, all options have been taken by other Mothers in distress, and were available to me.

Being made aware of the choices, and receiving credit for choosing to stay and to raise my son, was very empowering.  In that moment, I felt strong and free. I did have a choice! It was enlightening for me to see, I was choosing to be a parent!  I could feel the breathe come into my lungs. I left lighter, my head was higher.

Her advice helped me to understand my son was not my problem. My inability to cope was my problem.  My perception was my problem.  We worked on coping skills, and on perception.  It was at this time, with her guidance, I began rebuilding myself and taking responsibility and pride in my choices.

Sherrylee’s strength in reaching out is one of the great things about her.  I’d like to think it’s something we share.

Sherrylee reports her son is now working as a Supervisor for a mining company.  He’s doing great and she’s very proud of him.  Happily, she is also proud of herself for not giving up on him.  Together they faced challenges head-on.  Now her “chest nearly bursts with pride.”

Today her son still has ADHD.  He manages it well and has developed the coping skills necessary to deal with it.  Sherrylee describes him as one of her “life’s greatest accomplishments.”


  • Doreen Coady

    Author & Parenting Commentator

    Author of 100 Moms 1000 Tips 1 Million Reasons & 100 Dads 1000 Tips 1Million Reasons available on Amazon and major book stores.   Doreen is empty-nester who has spent the last five years collecting tips from 199 parents. Her heartwarming and real-talk, message on parenting is woven through their collective wishes and wisdom.   Parents are diverse in terms of age, culture, social-economic background, and beliefs. Contributions provide 2000 parenting tips from others interested in helping each other, especially new parents learning the ropes.   Every tip and commentary is distinct, providing a magnificent assortment of shared experiences. The collection conveys the depth, devotion, and breadth of parenting.   This is fun, enlightening, easy to read, and a highly relatable account of parenting successes and struggles.   For ‘the why,’ check out,, or search “100 Moms 1000 Tips” on Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram.