When I decided to write this book, Shelly was the very first Mom on my list. I’ve loved seeing her as a Mom, and admired her gratitude for her four sweet children.

Shelly loved parenting soooo much, she signed on for a second round. Having made it successfully out of the teen years with her first three, she ventured into parenting a fourth time. What ambition!

Shelly,Set examples from the start, not just manners. Setting examples start everywhere. Teach your young adults they can have a drink, and go to parties. Explain they must be responsible, and to not make it a habit. When driving the car, pay attention to how you drive. If you use your phone, remember they are watching.

My son was in the car with me one day, and my phone was sitting in the middle console. (The only reason I ever take it with me is in case I break down or something.) As we were driving my phone lit up, a text message must have come in and he saw it. There was no noise, because I never have the volume on. When my son said, “Your phone lit up you have a message.” I said it’s ok, I’m driving and I will look when I get home.”

The way things are now with teenagers, they’re learning bad habits from parents.Tip 6

I too am a big believer in setting an example! Shelly and I both set the bar high, and our kids reached higher.

I recall one day when Michael slammed his bedroom door. I hauled him back into the living room and said, “We don’t slam doors in this house.” Now, had I myself been a door slammer, there wouldn’t have been too much I could say on the matter. I had to model exactly what I expected. Michael never slammed another door.

I was very meticulous about this facet of parenting, I literally would not shake salt on my food in front of him. I did not curse, did not drink, gossip, or gamble, and I did not slam doors. Because I upheld such impeccable standards, I was in a position to expect the same.

I heard the phrase, “Be the type of person you hope your child would marry.” I followed that to the letter. I acted as if I had it all together even when I didn’t, especially when I didn’t. I modeled strength when I was weak, and calmness when I was crazy!

It is not at all effective to believe, or to preach, “Do as I say not as I do.” In my observations, it will not work! It is the most ridiculous, condescending, and ineffective approach to parenting in the entire history of parenting! Shelly and I were more of the, “do-as-I-do” type.

Thanks Shelly! Always fun seeing all your four little babies bring to your world.

For a chance to win a great “Mom Bag,” check out my first ever video on my Facebook page: https://www.facebook.com/100Moms1000Tips1MillionReasons/

Next week, Lindsay on being present.


  • Doreen Coady

    Author & Parenting Commentator

    Author of 100 Moms 1000 Tips 1 Million Reasons & 100 Dads 1000 Tips 1Million Reasons available on Amazon and major book stores.   Doreen is empty-nester who has spent the last five years collecting tips from 199 parents. Her heartwarming and real-talk, message on parenting is woven through their collective wishes and wisdom.   Parents are diverse in terms of age, culture, social-economic background, and beliefs. Contributions provide 2000 parenting tips from others interested in helping each other, especially new parents learning the ropes.   Every tip and commentary is distinct, providing a magnificent assortment of shared experiences. The collection conveys the depth, devotion, and breadth of parenting.   This is fun, enlightening, easy to read, and a highly relatable account of parenting successes and struggles.   For ‘the why,’ check out, https://99momsplusone.wordpress.com/, or search “100 Moms 1000 Tips” on Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram.