Several years ago, I was introduced to the pageant world when I was hired to provide coaching for the contestants of a preliminary pageant in the Miss America system. Since I wasn’t familiar with this form of competition, I began my research, which included attending something called “Work Weekend.”

Work Weekend is the annual event held a month before the Miss North Carolina state pageant. It’s where new judges are trained, and the state contestants are prepped for the upcoming week-long competition.

Each year during Work Weekend, the current Miss North Carolina gives a talk to the newest batch of contestants. She shares her experience of winning the crown, spending the entire year making appearances across the state, and promoting her philanthropic platform.

While attending this talk, I observed the contestants as they listened intently to the reigning Miss North Carolina. I noticed one contestant in particular who was writing feverishly in her notebook. She never once looked up.


A year later at Work Weekend, this same young woman stood before the latest batch of state contestants and told them how, when she was in their place, she was writing down what she wanted to say to them in her own speech.

Confidence comes from believing YOU CAN!

I knew what I had witnessed the previous year was someone who, in her mind, had already won the crown and was preparing for her role as queen. Within that year, I had watched this woman compete and win the Miss North Carolina title with laser-sharp focus, and go on to become the 2nd runner-up at Miss America.

Her example is a reminder that confidence doesn’t come from achieving your goal. It comes from believing you can achieve your goal. She was able to do what was within her control: she visualized it, prepared for it, and trusted God with the rest.

Three ways to build confidence and achieve your goal:

1. Visualize it.

Close your eyes and picture yourself having already achieved your goal. What do you see? What do you hear? What do you feel?

2. Prepare for it.

Taking your vision, work backward to determine what steps must be taken to arrive at your goal. Do you need to start a training program? Do you need to gain some additional education? Also, is there anything you can begin doing now that will be required of you once you have achieved your goal?

3. Trust in God.

Like Amanda Foust said in “How To Find Peace About The Future,” “We need to accept that the future is unpredictable in some ways, but what we do now does have an effect on where we will be later…Understanding our lack of control, continuing to work hard in the present, and letting God handle our future is the only sure way we will find peace.”

Are you waiting for a title or an achievement to gain confidence? Or are you working hard now to build the confidence needed to achieve your goals?


Check out the paNASH on-demand program Don’t Just Set Goals. ACHIEVE Them!

Originally published at thedailypositive.com on August 25, 2016.

Originally published at medium.com