It’s so easy to compare yourself to what others are doing and in the process, beat yourself up for not measuring up to other people’s successes and accomplishments? How do you stay true to who you are in a world that is constantly giving you messages to be someone else?

“To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment.” —Ralph Waldo Emerson

Here are 5 tips that I do to mentally unplug when I’m not able to physically step away for vacation:

1.Trust and love yourself. Engage in a social experiment.

My friend suggested this to me the other day where he asked me, “What if I delete Instagram?” At first, the thought of it shocked me, though it did make sense. Watching the constant newsfeed of how well others are seemingly having the time of their lives online takes away from what I’m focusing on and doing, so his idea was actually an interesting suggestion. Perhaps it’s creating a separate account and only following certain people to help with reducing the noise. Perhaps it’s deleting Instagram for a period of time. Give it a try and see what works for you. Personally, in days that have been focused on certain tasks, I’ve simply shut my phone altogether to focus. I found it to be so freeing to shut off from the world of my phone. Though I know that this doesn’t work for everyone, so give it a go and optimize based on your experiences.

2. Review and respect your boundaries.

Take an internal inventory and take the time and space to reflect. What are your needs and are you honouring them? One way that helped me was to have a coach ask me and then write down my responses.

Are there certain things that you are doing in order to please others? Do you have a hard time saying no? Do you know your limits of what you can and cannot do? What things have you been doing that make you feel resentful afterwards?

3. Let go of expectations and replace them with appreciation.

“Trade your expectations for appreciation and your whole world changes in an instant.” — Tony Robbins

This is a good daily reminder to come back to, especially when you are feeling triggered by emotions.

Do you genuinely enjoy doing the things that you’re doing for other people? Or do you expect a result or have an expectation that is attached to doing things for other people? Taking a moment to appreciate all that you have learned can help shift your perspective.

4. Come back to yourself and remember your personal brand.

Remember that you are special. Even if this means reminding yourself by writing it on notes everywhere where you can see it, know that you are unique. It may be tempting to compare your experiences with others and taking it personally when you don’t feel like you ‘measure’ up to others, though know that you are enough and what you do matters. Your brand and your experiences are things that only you have seen, felt and heard. So remember that as you navigate through the uncertainties and challenges of life, your experiences are something that no one can take away from you.

5. Give yourself a mental and physical break.

Remember all the scars and pain that you’ve been through (and keep relieving through via similar experiences?). Let it go, give yourself a hug and know that you are doing the very best that you can. A great re-frame to having experienced pain is knowing that you have attempted something new and learned from your experiences as a result.

This article was originally published on Medium.


  • Carolyn Lowe

    Brand Marketer | Storyteller | Connector

    Carolyn Consulting

    Carolyn is passionate about all things related to health and wellness.  She is a proactive and results driven leader with a track record of integrating authentic, cross-platform marketing experiences for startups, small and medium-sized businesses (SMEs), and global enterprises. Carolyn is also a Career/Mindset coach specializing in NLP.  She helps clients remove the charge on limiting emotions and beliefs to create new possibilities. With her experience in advertising and tech, she can relate and empathize with her clients' challenges to find empowering solutions. Carolyn writes about leadership, women in tech and health/wellness.