The relationship between a mother and daughter is Beautifully complex. It can be stressful, explosive, implosive, magnetic, restorative and so much more. The irony in its complexity is that no matter what it may be at any given moment, a well-timed hug can almost always re-set it right back to Beautiful. The bond between Mothers and Daughters: it is something kind of magical. Yet, wrapped up in all the magical complexities are often feelings of judgment and unmet expectations that pass between them: a complication of two powerful Goddesses trying to share the same orbit

While every Mother-Daughter relationship has its own particular complications and nuances, there is a universal need for daughters to know that in their Mother’s eyes, they are ENOUGH and that they are Everything that they are supposed to be. And every mother (who shall always remain a daughter at heart) needs to know the exact same thing. As mothers, we often get so wrapped up in making sure that we do what we are supposed to do in order to ensure that our daughters are everything that they are supposed to be that we forget that They Already Are and so are we.

Every Goddess needs to be reminded every once in a while that she was always and will always be Enough, as-is. For every daughter, I write this letter for you.

Dear Beautiful Daughter,

In order to be a good mother I thought that I had to be a smarter, stronger and better version of myself. In order to give you a good life, I also thought you had to be a smarter, stronger and better version of me. Smarter, to avoid my stupid mistakes. Strong enough to endure the pain of life. Better, so you could be happy. Sometimes, I wonder if in my efforts to make you the best version of who I am, I made you feel that there was something wrong with who you are. Of all of the things that I want you to know, please remember this always: If at anytime I made you feel like you should be something other than who you are, I was wrong.

If there’s any part of you still longing to be free

Any little part of you that felt suppressed by me

If I ever made you feel that anything about you is wrong

If any part of you was weakened in my attempts to make you strong

I release you from your bondage to the sky where you belong

Go shine your light unrepentantly

Please forgive me, I was wrong


  • Ashia Ervin

    Author | Educator | Innovator | Activist

    Ashia Ervin is a Jamaican American author and blogger, born in New Jersey and raised in the scenic Piedmont region of North Carolina. As a mother and an educator of over 15 years she has always had a love of literature, especially that which includes rich culture, diversity and acceptance which was such an important part of her upbringing. Ervin seeks to encourage families to thrive through self-acceptance, self-exploration and active gratitude.