Psychologists name getting one’s heartbroken as one of the most challenging things a person can endure. Some people take years to recover from a broken heart and some never do. Is it really possible to heal and become stronger after a heartbreak? Below are 7 things you can do to achieve that as shared by leading therapists.

Accept the Breakup

The first step to moving on is accepting that the relationship is over. This means no more sending texts, calling just to cry, hoping that the breakup is just a phase, and so on. Relationships end for a reason. It is often best to accept your losses and move on than keep trying to build on something that isn’t there, especially if the other person cheated.

Do Not Engage in Self-Blaming

Learn to have a positive self-image to improve your perspective while trying to move on. It is okay to realize that mistakes have been made and use that knowledge to be a better person rather than engage in self-blaming. Take responsibility and strive to be a wiser and stronger person. This way, you improve your self-worth and become a better version of you who is ready for new beginnings.

Think that a Break Up Does Not Define You

Heartbreaks happen. It doesn’t mean that you failed, only that you have another chance in the future. Don’t define yourself as dumped, failure, or divorcee. Define yourself as someone who loved and made a few mistakes but is willing to learn and love again. You are who you decide to be.  

Recognize the Need for Closure

Strong people don’t allow themselves to wallow in the heartbreak and waste time stalking their exes in Facebook. They recognize that often the bravest thing to do is to go for a complete break to allow for healing to take place. What has happened has already happened. Move on and close a chapter when it’s due.

Don’t Let the Breakup Get to You

Just because you got your heart broken does not mean you are any less desirable; if any, your market value in the dating field just went up. So what if your ex failed to recognize that you’re a catch? Their rejection of you is a failure in their perception, not you as a person. Remember, somewhere out there is someone wishing for a chance to meet someone like you. Move on and be open to all the opportunities that now awaits you.

Don’t Try to Win the Breakup

There is no competition in who gets to move on first or who finds someone new first. Each person moves on in his or her own pace. Focus on enjoying being single while being open for possibilities at the same time. Finding happiness again is what a real ‘win’ is.

Let Go of Emotional Baggage

Do not hold on to past hurts because they will only blind you from what could be in front of you right now. While it is true that everyone has secrets and deep wounds from past relationships, especially if they’ve been lied to, what makes a person stronger is the willingness to move past all that. Self-awareness of past mistakes won’t hurt to be a better person, but holding on to them will not make your present and future any better. Just let go.