“I’ve been looking
I’ve been staring down”

Collective Soul: Staring Down

“Rocking”, or wanting/learning how to “Rock in life” along with the “Focus” needed to do so, remains a constant theme behind my writings. Another recurring theme in my writings will be, “WYLIWYG™ (Will-eee-wig)”.

I’ve had both happen to me during my dating years:

Situation #1: a quick glance at a woman garnered a glance black with a smile, which ended up in the two of locking eyes on each other leading to positive communication

Situation #2: a quick glance at a woman led me to look (stare) at her which, garnered the negative communication from her of, “would you like to take a picture”?

Harmless right? Hopefully positive self-education (for me?…yes it was). But it’s not life vs. death!

I spent eight years as a Driving Instructor for Young Drivers of Canada (YD). I was at the top of my Profession – a licensed Supervisor teaching people to become Instructors. I evaluated company fleet drivers and other Instructors. YD is, in my professional opinion, the best driving school around, not only teaching one how to drive, but also teaching incredible life lessons at the same time. One gets what they pay for and in the matter of learning how to stay alive on the roads, no one does it better than YD.

As a new vehicle driver, one must be taught how to move one’s eyes properly. You think that is a trivial statement? Not on your Life! If one only looks straight ahead of them, they will inevitable be in a crash and possibly killed due to missing what’s in their periphery. If one look somewhere else for too long, other than their intended direction – same results are possible. We taught new drivers to move their eyes every two seconds. We taught them how to identify and acknowledge distractions and to prioritize them. In my previous blog on September 20, 2018: “Distractions”, I described what happens to drivers if they “Look” at the parked car. Simple as is seems, the driver’s reaction can very well be a Life vs. Death decision.

If you look at the Fear – you become the Fear. If you Look at the Sadness – you become the Sadness! If you Look at the Distraction – You become Distracted!

Distractions in life include: a break-up, a death in our circle of life, a loss of a job, your team losing, sickness, loneliness, being bullied, living through abuse, being ridiculed, financial strains, mental and physical health strains, being in a car crash, the feeling of inadequacy or under-achievement, the desire to escape reality via alcohol-drugs or any mind-altering substances, the desire to escape by having to become someone else in order to make ends-meet, and sometimes just feeling sad about life itself; these, and so many more, are all extremely powerful “feelings” and they cause our eyes to “stop moving”. They cause us to get into a stare. We cannot multi-task quickly enough. We no longer feel the energy to be aware of life.

A self-awareness or presence-of-mind is required. That does not come automatically with a life. Some times we need someone else to help us understand what we need to acquire. Parents are perfect for doing this but many times are biased or possibly in denial of mental and emotional states not being perfect – themselves as well as others. That’s why the education system is the ideal place to being aware of differences. The fact there are standards is good. The main problem is that those standards are not used properly and differ so much from one place to another. There are many other problems too but that is not the reason for this article.

Try this: focus on one item for two seconds, then glance at another specific item for two seconds – then back to the original for two seconds. After five days, continue doing it but say out loud, to yourself, what you are seeing each time you move your eyes. Keep repeating this and you will train your eyes, and thus your mind, to become more observant and aware. Always when and where it’s safe, do this for a month in different settings, even driving a car. It will then start to become natural. I guarantee you will be surprised at what and how you now see what is really out there and, how you can start to control the distractions.

So, what are YOU looking at – in life? Keep thinking about that until next time and we will continue learning how to Rock your world! Remember WYLIWYG™!