Today, in between making breakfast for my son (who isn’t feeling well) and trying to rearrange a work meeting, I was messaging with a dear friend and rising life coach, Melissa, when she asked me a question I hear a lot these days: “How do you do it all?”
I stopped to think about what she meant by all, but her next message quickly answered my question. Actually, her words were “And how the hell do you juggle a job, a business, a husband, and two babies?” I smiled and sent her a Bitmoji of Superwoman on my phone. That’s how I do it. I don my cape and declare myself Superwoman. 🙂
But then I took a moment to think about how I actually do it all. I started going through a list in my mind of all the “roles” I take on: mother, wife, daughter, sister, friend, employee, business owner, student, mentor, accountant, cook, cleaner, laundress, and on and on. Sometimes, it astounds me at how much I have on my plate. I don’t usually stop to think about it because, frankly, I’d probably scare myself!
It’s important for me to remember that I didn’t become all of these things all at once. It’s not like I gave birth twice, got married, bought a house, started a job and a business, and did the laundry all in the same moment. It’s been an evolution; one step at a time. And that is the first answer to how I do it all.
Some days, I’m all mom. Some days, I’m 100% mom 25% of the time, 100% employee 50% of the time, and 100% business owner the other 25% of the time. See what I’m getting at? I couldn’t possibly (mentally or physically) be all these things all the time and be good at any one thing. But, I can be all of these things at different times and be really good at all of them.
The second answer to how I do it all is support. This has also been an evolution for me. I’m more of an “I can do it all myself” type of person and receiving support has been a huge growth opportunity for me. Learning how to receive support really started after my son (my second baby) was born. My mother-in-law was helping me after my mom left and she would tell me to go take a nap and she would watch the baby and help out with other tasks. I would fight her because I wanted to be the one to do it all. She gently insisted and when my exhaustion won, I conceded and went to bed. Her support helped me be a better mom. I rested, the baby was well cared for, and dinner was on the table when I woke up. It’s amazing what support can do.
So there you have it. My answer to the how I do it all question. This moment of reflection has been very rewarding for me because I never take the time to acknowledge everything that I actually do. It’s like an evaluation at a job, but with much kinder results. Taking time to reflect on all the experiences we have and all the experiences we create is such a blessing. It reflects back to us how incredibly strong and capable we are and how we have the ability to create anything we want. Anything. We. Want. That’s so powerful.