Before you read on, I need to tell you something. Up until February this year, I used to believe that Mindfulness/Self Love/Healing yourself and Meditation was a lot of ‘woo-woo’ nonsense. I mean, how the hell can you make amazing life changes, just from connecting with your breath? What a lot of crap, I thought. People that do all that stuff, are definitely a bit weird. I was way too cool for that. At the same time, there was so much within my life that I wanted to change, but had no idea where to even begin, and felt a huge amount of guilt for even thinking I wanted more. I just thought, this was it for me. Don’t get me wrong I had moments of awesomeness. I had a lovely family home, a nice car, 2 healthy kids, and great friends, so why did I need more? Most of the time I felt there was more, but didn’t think I could get it, or worse, I didn’t deserve it.

Your alarm goes off in the morning, you automatically hit snooze at least, once right?

Straight away, without even thinking, you’ve hit the snooze button. It’s hard wired, and so automatic. Immediately, you are sending a signal to your brain that says ‘I do not want to wake up, and begin my day’

You eventually get up, but you don’t feel like jumping out of bed, because not much motivates you about the way your day is looking. Why is it when we need to get up super early for a holiday, or when we wake up knowing we don’t have to work, we tend to wake up easier, and feel happier about the day ahead?

You go about your day, stressing about things that haven’t even happened yet, so is it any wonder that you attract negativity?

You find yourself moaning on about things you believe you can’t change, again attracting more and more negativity.

I read that you become an average of the 5 people you surround yourself with most. Now, seeing as you tend to spend most of your time at work, then this makes sense to me, and to why I felt the way I felt.

You come home after another ‘hard day in the office’, do some more work, watch a bit of TV. You go to bed feeling tired, and the only positive thing about having to get up and do it all over again tomorrow is the fact that you are 1 day closer to the weekend. All the while, you’re wishing your life away.

You do the same things over and over again, and very quickly they become hard wired in your subconscious mind. You go to make a coffee, you do it without thinking, you get a shower, reach for the soap, again, you do it without thinking about the process. How many times have you driven to work, arrived there, and thought ‘I can’t even remember how I got here’ it’s all hardwired in to your subconscious. You do something enough, you form a habit, and it gets locked in to the subconscious mind.

They say 90% of your mind is made up of your subconscious, which makes sense, but what a scary thought. How many times do you put yourself down? You look in the mirror, and self-sabotage kicks in?

‘I look a mess today, I need to lose weight’ or ‘I am no good at this, I can’t do that, I’m not confident, he/she is so much better than me. If only I was smarter, or more confident’

I could go on and on here, and you get where I’m going with this. You wouldn’t talk to anyone the way you talk to yourself, so is it any wonder you’re not excited about getting up every morning?

This is what I call existing, and not truly living to your full potential. Someone asks, ‘How are you?’ what do you say? Do you say, ‘I’m amazing’ or do you say, ‘I’m fine’?

Who the hell wants to be FINE??!!! Did you know that the odds of you being born at the moment in time you were born, with the DNA you were born with is 1 in 400 trillion? And you want to just be ‘FINE’

  • It’s fine, I hate my job

  • It’s fine, I am overweight

  • It’s fine, I’m in an unhappy relationship

  • It’s fine, I’m unhealthy

  • It’s fine, I wish my life away

Really? It’s fine is it? So, you wouldn’t want to feel amazing or incredible? You’d rather believe and accept that ‘Fine’ is way better?

You’re ‘fine’ having the same conversations with yourself and others over and over?

I’m going to get another job….. you don’t.

I’m going to lose weight….. you don’t.

I’ll start my healthy living plan again on Monday…. You don’t.

I’m going to start being more positive about things…. You don’t.

Here’s the thing, you tell yourself over and over again you’re fine. Fine is code for ‘I don’t need to do anything about it’. Yip, you have convinced yourself that your ‘fine’ with not having everything that is your birth right.

I appreciate I’m being brutal here, but I need you to wake up, and start putting some positive hardwired changes in to your subconscious mind.

In any area of your life that you want to change, you have the power to do it. You probably have so many ideas or thoughts swimming through your head at various points of the day, but because you tell yourself ‘I’m fine’ you end up letting that thought go. All the while hard wiring in to your subconscious, yet again that it doesn’t matter, that you don’t deserve to have abundance in all aspects of your life. You have created that story for yourself. It wasn’t your boss, your husband, wife or partner. It wasn’t your friends, or work colleagues. It was you, by telling yourself ‘I’m fine’.

It takes physical force to make changes, and in the beginning, most of the time you don’t want to do it. You know you should, but 90% of your mind is screaming ‘NO’

When I started this process, it wasn’t easy. It was simple and not at all complicated, but it wasn’t always easy. I had been conditioned for most of my life to believe my story, and it was all I really knew. Of course, it wasn’t easy to change the mindset, this was going to take a bit of work.

All of my beliefs had been hard wired in my brain, so of course when I tried to do something different, my brain was like ‘Wait a minute, hold on, what the F are you doing?? This is new, I don’t like this, who do you think you are girl? Just stay as you are’. This was my not so comfortable ‘Comfort Zone’ and bullshit ego talking. The ego that I had allowed to make the rules for the past 30 years. I thought I had hard wired values, but the truth is, I wasn’t living my values. I was too busy complaining to appreciate and enjoy doing the things I liked to do.

The amazing thing here is that, you have free will, and get to choose. It doesn’t matter what age you are, or what your story has been up until this moment, YOU GET TO CHOOSE.

Get out of your negative self talk head and force yourself to make changes. Don’t listen to the noise. Surround yourself with people who will build you up. If you are an average of the 5 people closest to you, maybe you should rethink your network? Now I’m not saying fall out of love with your partner, or fall out with your family, but start to surround yourself with people who get it.

If you have a deep desire to have more, DO IT!! Get out of your comfort zone, don’t accept ‘Fine’. Don’t play small to make others feel better. Remember the odds of you being on this earth are 1 in 400 trillion. You’re a gift, with a beating heart, thoughts and ideas in abundance. Do you think you were put on this earth to play small? I don’t think so, and you deserve way more than ‘Fine’.

It’s time to wake the hell up and start living instead of existing.

My mission is to reach and help as many people as possible to become the best version of themselves. This came from me being the worst version of mine. It’s time to take back what’s yours, and RAISE HELL!!

If you’re ready to go there, then I want to hear from you ASAP.

You can find me on Facebook (Jill Ritchie – Transformation & Life Success Coaching)

on Instagram (Justjillcoaching)

or my website –

With love and gratitude,

Jill x

Originally published at