The ability to spread information quickly and to larger numbers of people has increased drastically over the years. The printing press, which began in the 1940s, was one of the first inventions to influence large-scale communication. Postal services hand delivering letters and packages added to this. When the invention of the internet arrived, followed by social media and all its platforms, we entered a whole new universe with regards to the spread of information, and oftentimes misinformation. Spouting hate, cruelty and lies was easier than ever to do. Of course, on the other hand, spreading hope, inspiration and kindness was too. As with any invention, it can be used for the greater good or it can be used to its detriment. All things come down to a choice.
Here is what I know. If you are someone who desires to create a greater life and chooses to go for it, you will be judged, as the status quo is generally more accepted. If you are someone who desires to see changes in the world and you use your voice to address those things, you will be judged, as the masses are often prone to hurl insults to anyone who sees things differently. If you are different from most, having your own points of view, choosing what works for you and saying no to what doesn’t, you will be judged, as society tends to favor conformity. Basically, if you are going to dare to have the life you desire, you will be vilified. My question to you is, how are you going to handle it? Are you going to stop moving forward? Using your voice? Choosing the life, you desire? Or, in the face of judgement will you keep going? Here we are. Back at choice.
The first vilification that I received was about a book that I have written called Getting Out of Debt Joyfully. I was accused of offering unsound financial advice and selling lies. Recently, there has been another wave of vilification via social media which has caused me to really look at how I was going to deal with all of this. What was I going to choose? Was I going to give up? Or, was I going to keep choosing, every day daring to have and be more? I am not saying that is always easy, but the latter is my choice. Here are some tools that I have used to assist me with this process:
Other people’s points of view are not right or wrong. They are just points of view.
The guy who posted the article regarding my book, thinks that my book is full of lies. That is his point of view. He is allowed to have his point of view, but I do not have to buy his point of view as real and true. This is my story. I use the tools I talk about. They work. They changed my whole financial reality. Nobody knows me or my life like I do. At the end of the day, I am happy with me and happy with my choices and that is enough.
A tool from Access Consciousness that you can use if you are having a hard time allowing someone else to have their own point of view is something known as ‘Interesting point of view.’ It is very simple. Every time you notice that you are in resistance to someone’s point of view, say to yourself, “Interesting point of view. They have that point of view.” And “Interesting point of view. I think they should have a different point of view.” When you use this tool, you stop making points of view right or wrong and they simply become an opinion. Opinions are not significant. Everybody has them and they do not mean anything.
Recognize that your life is different from others and that is okay.
Years ago, there were 3 women that I thought were my friends who were saying all sorts of horrible things about me.
I rang up Gary Douglas, the founder of Access Consciousness and said: I don’t know if I can be the Worldwide Coordinator for this company anymore?
Gary: What do you mean? Talk to me. Tell me what is going on.
Me: I don’t think I can handle the judgements anymore.
Gary: Okay, here is what I want you to do. Have a look at their lives and what they are choosing. Not from a place of judging them. Simply looking without a point of view. It is their life. It is their choice. Just be honest with yourself about what they are choosing. Now, look at your life and what you are choosing. Again, not from judgement.
As I went through this exercise, I got it! I always wanted more. My entire life was lived from, “What’s next? What’s next? What’s next?” Always choosing more. Always reaching for more. I still am. That gave me such clarity that always choosing more, daring to have a greater life every single day has always been the life I am choosing. That is not what these 3 ladies were choosing. That does not make them wrong. That does not make me right. What each of us desire for our lives is different and that is okay.
Focus on gratitude.
While I was being vilified for my book Getting Out of Debt Joyfully, I was simultaneously receiving notes and messages from so many people thanking me for sharing my story and the tools of Access Consciousness that I used to change my financial reality. I even had one lady reach out to say that she had been considering ending her life because she had acquired so much debt and had no idea how to change her situation. She discovered my book and her whole life changed.
For every hater that vilifies you, there are many more admirers who are so grateful for you. When you live the life that you desire no matter what anyone says, people see that and it inspires them. When you speak up and act towards creating the world you would like to see, others who had concluded that they couldn’t make a difference get up and take action too. Focus on the gratitude that is flowing your way. It is so easy to allow that hate to dominate but gratitude is far greater.
What is the life YOU desire? What is the future that you would like to see? What possibilities do you know are available that you would like to contribute to actualizing on the planet? Will you dare to choose whatever that is for you? Will you commit to creating it? If you say yes, judgement will come your way. Recognize that judgement is not real. In the words of Brene Brown, “There are a million cheap seats in the world today filled with people who will never be brave with their own lives, but will spend every ounce of energy they have hurling advice and judgement at those of us trying to dare greatly.”
If you would like to sit in one of the million cheap seats, be my guest. You are not wrong. For those of you who are trying to dare greatly, let’s explore what else is possible for ourselves and for the world.