Being feminine is not all about wearing floaty dresses and makeup, having long hair or liking pink. In fact you could be doing all of those things and still be embodying masculine energy.
These energies are also not directly related to being male or female. Many women embody more of their masculine energy, whereas some men can be more feminine. However the fact that men have more testosterone means that they will typically be more masculine.
Masculine energy is:
The masculine is achievement-orientated and values productivity and getting things done. It involves activities such as competitive sports, setting goals, hitting targets and getting results. Even many traditional self-help books are based on this achievement model.
Being in the feminine
On the other hand, feminine energy is about doing things just for the enjoyment or pleasure of them without having a goal in mind.
It is knowing you are enough just as you are and you don’t have to do or achieve anything to be valuable and loved.
Feminine energy is:
– Being present
It involves activities such as relaxing, meditating, spending time with loved ones, walking in nature, enjoying a massage, painting, creative writing, dancing, laughing and being sensual.
We all have masculine and feminine energy and both are needed. There is nothing inherently wrong with expressing our masculine side. If you are too much in your feminine energy you would never get anything done! Masculine containers are the structures that hold us in life – routines, rules, systems and plans.
Unfortunately because our society tends to value masculine values more, many women end up embodying this side of themselves more and getting burnt out. This happened to me when I used to have a fast-paced media job.
As women have less testosterone, being in masculine energy all the time can cause us to live in constant flight/ flight mode relying on adrenaline to get by. I relate to this so much from when I use to work on a national newspaper. It took me so much adrenaline just to get through the day. It was a buzz at the time but I ended up getting really ill with adrenal fatigue and autoimmune disease.
How to get more balanced
If you feel that you tend to live more I your masculine energy, bringing mindfulness into your life can help.
In the courses I run, I teach about ‘green zone’ activities. These are the things that help us be more in our feminine energy. They include:
– Slowing down your pace of life
– Paying attention to and being fully present as you do your daily activities
– Taking breaks
– Walking in nature
– Savouring your food and drink
– Having fun, laughing
– Enjoying physical pleasure like a massage or bath
– Art activities (for fun not for the end result)
– Getting back into hobbies you’ve neglected
– Really listening and being present when somebody speaks to you
Feminine energy is all about slowing down and stopping to smell the flowers. It sounds simple, but it can be easier said than done in our fast-paced, goal-orientated patriarchal society. When we slow down we can often experience guilt and shame about not being productive enough.
That’s why in my courses I slowly bring in different activities so that over the course of eight weeks you will become more mindful in a sustainable way that allows you to make more change in your life. To find out more click here.