Have you ever felt robustly stuck? Worked yourself into a psychological corner and couldn’t find your way out? In a place where you began a project and the desired outcome feels farther from reach than when you began?
I was in this place over the wekend with a project that I took on which I thought would be manageable on my own. I take on projects with a sense of adventure. A healthy project layered with complexity can offer a satisfying grounding unlike any other kind of work. Sometimes this kind of project can present challenges that range outside my expertise. Being able to recognize this is wisdom earned is invaluable for next time.
But what about this time? I am in the middle of this time right now. I am creating a coaching program unlike anything else I have done in my past teaching and consulting experience. Because of the uniqueness to my industry, I don’t have personal mentors who can help me in this perplexing moment. It has been a bit stressful as investments have been made in time and money to realize being on the other side of this course launch. I have been “taking a break” for a couple of months now.
In real time, I have gone through the five stages of grief in realizing exactly what I have gotten myself into. I have failed my goals in regard to my timeline. Those close to me are beginning to wonder why. My partner is supportive, but doesn’t know how to help me. I go to the internet to figure out some strategies for healing and dealing with this loss. Healing is my background as an Ayurveda Nutrition Coach and Yoga Teacher. I am satisfied with my search leading me to Deepak Chopra, who helps me through with these wonderful tips for getting centered and finding balance. It is great to be reminded of how to pause and sustain energy.
These tips of slowing down and returning to self-care are fantastic because I started to neglect my meditation practice to try to get ahead in my work. This was a grave misstep. I was filling my head with too many thoughts, searches, tasking, and going in directions that were unproductive. The space taking up my brain was creating a bloated and mind-numbing experience – a vata imbalance. A flurry of thoughts about how I could make it work was counter-productive to realizing my goals.
Approcahing this moment of vulnerability and marking it with validity has helped me to acknowledge what is actually happening. With some perspective, I haven’t exactly gotten myself into a corner. The project has transformed into one that is going to have a different outcome than planned. I need some help to lead myself in the direction that will work fastest, so I have done a lot of research and decided that I am going to need to let go of my ideas that this entire project could be a DIY arrangement. I don’t have all of the skills (yet) to create the space I have dreamed up.
After some soul searching and combing through coaches who can help me, I found the magical person who is helping me to understand how I can do this with the skills that I have. I CAN DO THIS. There is a process. I have been taking steps that are too large and not seeing results. As I apply the principles that I have learned in a single one hour coaching call, I realize that need to pivot in a new direction. I have a plan and see how I will be on track in my first iteration of this course launch. This is huge!
Recognizing the feelings of vulnerability can be difficult for those of us who pride ourselves on doing what we say we are going to do. In those times of a project (or adventure) when we come to a struggle when we don’t have the skills to overcome, relying on ourselves is a potent ask. Really, it is requisite of coming from a place of self-love. Dr. Brene Brown notes on vulnerability, “Self-respect, the wildest adventure we’ll ever take in our whole lives.” With an established self-care and self-love in place, the simple rituals that we do to ready ourselves for bed, nourish our bodies with wholesome food, enjoy the company of supportive people, and exercising our bodies for good health. When we do these things habitually, we have already created an iron-clad path of self respect and self worth to help us in times of vulnerability.
Re-igniting this project was a form of self respect. I know that I can do anything, especially when I have the right tools and support systems to create the boundary for me to be successful and limitless!
Empowering my work with the support of a coach was a great step for me to re-invent my path on this adventure of launching an online course. I am learning so much about the steps that I didn’t know which need to happen before I can realize my outcome. In the end, knowing these steps will now take less time to accomplish than if I spent time trying to figure out what I missed. Finding my magical coach has steered me in the right direction and I am so grateful that I am able to do this to bring my work to others in a new way.
Have you experienced a similar stall in project management? How did you handle it. I would love to learn of your experience in the comments below!