As we head into the holiday season, I’ve been thinking a lot about gratitude.
It’s a time of year when we’re encouraged, sometimes even expected, to focus on what we’re thankful for. And there’s beauty in that.
Gratitude is powerful. It helps us stay grounded. It brings us back to what matters most. It shifts our attention from what’s lacking to what’s present.
But here’s something else I’ve learned: Gratitude doesn’t cancel out grief. And grief doesn’t make gratitude any less real.
Both can live in the same heart.
This time of year can stir up so much joy, and also so much sadness.
We celebrate. We connect. We reflect on the year.
But we also feel the absences more deeply. The losses. The distance. The memories of years that looked different.
For me, this season always brings up a mix of emotions. I think about the people I’ve lost. The dreams that shifted. The ways life didn’t go according to plan.
And right alongside that, I feel deep appreciation for what I do have, my family, my work, my health, the people I get to impact and be impacted by.
The older I get, the more I realize: Gratitude and grief don’t compete. They complete each other.
In leadership, and in life, we need to make space for both.
So often, especially at work, we push down one to elevate the other. We focus on performance and positivity, and unintentionally leave no room for disappointment or reflection.
But the most human workplaces, the most connected teams, are the ones where people feel safe to bring both the light and the dark…all of who they are.
Where it’s okay to feel thankful and tired. Hopeful and heavy. Where someone can say, “I’m grateful for this team… and I’m also having a really hard time right now.”
As leaders, as teammates, as people, we can hold both. We can model both. And we can invite others to do the same.
So as you move through this season, ask yourself:
What am I truly grateful for right now? What’s heavy on my heart that I haven’t named? How can I honor both and allow others to do the same?
You don’t need to pretend everything is great to be grateful. And you don’t need to hide your gratitude just because you’re grieving something or someone.
Let’s normalize the full range of emotions this time of year can bring. Let’s lead with compassion, for ourselves and for others.
Let’s remember that authenticity isn’t about choosing one feeling over another; it’s about allowing all of them to be true.
Gratitude and grief can coexist. And in that space, there’s room for connection, growth, and real humanity.
We’re all in this together.
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