I wish I could’ve been a fly on the wall when the concept of “conventional” was conceived. Why the need for being the same? Following the heard? Being ordinary when we’re made to be anything but?
Was it born out of uncertainty or confusion? “I see someone else doing this and they seem to know what’s going on so I’ll do it too.”
A follower of someone with a better way? “Wow, she makes it look so easy. I must be doing something wrong.”
Or perhaps it was a fear or rejection based thought process: “If I do this I’ll gain favor. Maybe then they’ll like me and I’ll fit in.”
Regardless, at some point it became commonplace to take our fate out of our own hands and bestow it to the mainstream movement. Go outside ourselves to discover what’s right and silence the little voice within.
In my curiosity to understand this concept I did what any rational person would do, I Googled it. The first thing that popped up was the definition:
Adjective: conventional
Based on or in accordance with what is generally done or believed.
Not surprising, I kept reading:
– (of a person) Concerned with what is generally held to be acceptable at the expense of individuality and sincerity.
Wait, what??? How can we blindly adhere to something that holds the harmful truth in it’s very definition?!?
I remember clinging to this notion when I entered the real world. Compliance contained me, kept me “normal”. Yet somehow I still found myself slowly dying inside. I didn’t understand why. I was doing everything I should. Start a career, work hard and climb the ladder, settle down, get married.
The part I overlooked, is that none of this felt right to me. I knew inside that no cookie cutter could ever contain everything I want to be and do. We’re not meant to be fenced in, we’re meant to be free. But I continued to ignore that feeling, to my own detriment.
This belief had served me when I wanted to fit in, be liked, work my way up to being admired and maybe then I would feel worthwhile. Prove myself to friends and family. But on the climb, I realized this was not the case. Always looking outside for the validation that can only come from within.
So why do we hang onto it?
Sure, being conventional has it’s upside. Standardization is great when it comes to repetitive tasks, attention to detail or creating routine in our lives. But it’s not so good for figuring out who you are and what makes you happy. Freedom doesn’t
Take a look around. We’re all different shapes, sizes, colors, personalities, styles and so much more. It’s what makes this world beautiful. Divergent view points helping us experience, see and understand as never before. Anything you want to learn at your fingertips. Surrounded by endless possibilities for creating the life of your dreams.
Today, I’m anything but conventional. And I couldn’t be more thankful for finding another way.
What area of your life do you need to rethink?