Not anymore in your seventeenth, life becomes much a routine. With your partner, your children, your family life is good enough. But you seem to miss something. There is an invisible force that seems to push you towards searching for a renewal, a more passionate and loving relationship. How do you regain the spark in a relationship? Sometimes you feel guilty. “May I sit back and feel happy with what I have!”.
But don’t worry, your wish is legitimate. Because it’s the force of the universe that is pushing you. The universe is ever expanding, in its eternal dance of life, and of love.
Probably like you, at a certain moment in my life, I used to think that romantic love didn’t exist anymore. Love for my children, yes. But even that, everyday life had become so much a worn-out path. I remember asking myself: “Is it this, that life is supposed to evolve? That true love and passionate relationships are only a mirage? That I should be happy with this everyday life sterile of beautiful and intense moments? And lastly, am I worthy for more?”
Here is what I learned. From the moment that we are open to the source of love from the universe, we are open to the most beautiful source of heartfelt passions. And it is in any relationship, either it is with your children, with your partner, or only a few seconds with a passenger by whom you crossed on a sunny morning.
So how do you regain the spark in a relationship? Here below are what I learned.
#1. The secret of relationship is from within
We often put our focus on the external world, relationships included. We try to regain happiness and fulfillment from the elements outside of us. This expectation will inevitably lead us to deception, resentment, and emotional frustration. For example, your relationship might not be anymore as “romantic” as it could be. And you expect your partner to change him or herself, and to improve the relationship. But there is only one thing that can change it, and regain the spark in your relationship. Yourself.
Changing yourself does not mean you change your behaviors or the ways of being, to meet the expectation of your partner. Changing yourself means giving an opportunity to see you from a more profound level. To retrieve the source of inspiration and love within you, and to be able to let it transmit around you.
But how to do it?
#2. How do you regain the spark in a relationship? Renew your heart!
To regain the spark in a relationship, you’ve heard people advising you to be more romantic, hold hands, book a crazy activity… But are really those things that will renew your relationship? I was in a 13-year relationship. And believe me, you can do all that you want, the other might not even pay attention to it. Your effort to renew a relationship does not seem to cause any impact. The heavy wheel that already runs too slowly between you two is not easy to be moved.
Why does our effort to change not bring its fruits? Listen deeply, the simple reason is this. Renewal in a relationship is first from a renewed heart. All your affection and expression to the persons around you must come from your heart. And that’s the only way to change.
Well, yes, you may agree or not, but “love is the only force capable of changing the world”… and your relationship!
But how to find back love within yourself? How to let the loving energy of the universe cross your body and mind, and inspire each corner of your eyes and each of your smiles? When your hand touches that of your beloved one, how will it touch him or her deeply?
#3. Find back the love within you
The world is your mirror. You can only regain a spark in your relationship, and find back loving and passionate moments, if your heart is profoundly filled with love.
“A true partner or friend is someone who encourages you to discover in the most profound of yourself the beauty and the love that you search”Thich Nhat Hanh
When we love someone, we think that the other is beautiful. We consider him or her an object of our love. But we don’t understand that she or he is only the reflection of the beauty of our own mind. In order to find back a passionate love, we must find back first of all the energy of love within our own mind.
Indeed, no matter how hard you work, your action has no use if it does not connect with the energy of life. And no matter how small the action is, but with love, its force is multiplied. It can touch others profoundly.
I started to find back true love when I learned to open myself to the loving energy from the universe. And here was how I started to re-discover my loving energy: Love myself.
#4. Self-love helps you regain the spark in your relationships
Many of us never learn to truly take care of ourselves. Our relationship is based on the tentative to find someone to take care of us. So we have the tendency to do what they want and be the person they wish. So they’ll be there for us and not leave us. But this system does not work well. Because others can never meet in permanence our expectations. Therefore, we are always in frustration and disappointment.
The day we understand that we can take care of and ourselves before all, and practice self-compassion, that is the day we renew our relationship from within. Because when we truly connect with ourselves, we join with the creative power of the universe. You can quasi see the universe create through you. Your actions and ways of being are inspiring, interesting, passionate, creative, and original. And when you love someone, your love is so passionate that it can melt any heart.
#5. Mindful living can help
Mindful living is a great practice to give yourself the opportunity to create a link with your true nature. Practice mindful eating, mindful listening, mindful breathing… The easy things to start are mindfulness meditation and yoga. Similarly, take time to practice noble silence. A moment each day, to sit silently, and to “be”, without too many activities. Connect with nature and other mindful practices inspire yourselves from the intelligence force of the universe. Silently sit to contemplate a sunset, listen to a water stream, or smell the fragrance of a flower. This way, we enter into contact with the profound pulsation of life, with its limitless creativity.
When you connect to this inner silence, and if your desire is to find true love, your channel is widely open. You will feel the energy of love from the universe that runs through you. You’ll be guided to take the right action at the right time. Don’t worry, and don’t plan anything in advance. Abandon yourself to this energy that is going to guide you. Your eyes will spark joy and love. They are so authentically that others just can’t miss them.
#6. What if my renewed love is not for my… partner?
This is a good question. When you abandon yourself to the force of love from the universe, you can be open to all that it brings you. And there are some chances that your “renewed” love is not for your… partner!
This is because, the person who can’t connect with your new “you”, with its level of vibration, will either transform to be with the”new” you or disappear from your life. Instead, you will attract those who are in the same vibration. Don’t fret. That’s the beginning of all passionate and loving relationship that you deserve.
Afraid of being blessed? Of adventure? Of losing what is conventionally thought to be a good life (a stable job, a family…)? Life is an adventure anyway. It’s an experience, where you’ll have a chance to experience all its beauty. And when you can abandon yourself to the force of the universe, you’ll find true love and passionate relationships.
Regain the spark in a relationship today
When our relationship becomes a routine, we intuitively search for a renewal, a more passionate and loving connection. But how to regain the spark in a relationship?
Here is what I learned. From the moment that we are open to the source of love from the universe, we are open to the most beautiful source of heartfelt passions.
Start first with the awareness that the secret for a sparkling relationship is from within. Renewal in a relationship is first from a renewed heart. With mindful living, you can find back the love within you, and allow it to transmit to your surrounding.
When you feel the energy of love that is running through you and abandon yourself to this energy that is going to guide you, your whole person will spark joy and love. And they are so authentically that others just can’t miss them. That’s the true beginning to regain the spark in a relationship.
Sounds too difficult? Even the biggest journey starts with a little step! Tell me what you think.