Criticism is like a compliment, but the feelings aftermath are not same. Compliment bring smile. Criticism bring what ? Mad, cry, dissatisfied and even decision to give up.
Criticism is like needle. It small but the pain we get from critics can hurt so much. As a normal human being, criticism is normal.
It happen in work, home, social media and public place. Today, we may get the criticism. On the other, we may be the critics. If you are a politician, criticism may be in whole another level.
As we grow in this life, we must learn to deal with criticism. We don’t want the criticism become barrier to move further in career, relationship and even life.
Follow these 7 steps to learn how to handle criticism assertively and grow from the criticism.
1. Be open to other person’s comments
Some of the feedback you receive may be difficult to hear, but don’t get defensive.
Be relax and don’t show any reaction that you don’t like to hear.
Keep your facial expression neutral. Make sure you look at the person.
It’s the time, you learn from the feedback.
2. Don’t interrupt
Let the critic talk. People who are being critiqued often jump in immediately to start clarifiying or justifiying their action.
You don’t want to cut the comments short because they may contain helpful information.
Critics give criticism for a reason. Good reason or not, you decide it.
3. Ask for details
Sometimes people provide only generalizations when giving you feedback, such as “Your proposal didn’t work.” Yet to be able to learn from someone’s comments, you need the person to be specific.
If you are comfortable doing so, ask for more information. Questions like, “What exactly do you mean by “didn’t work?”, or “What should I add to the presentation to improve it?” may give you clear example what to learn from the feedback.
4. Paraphrase
You need to make sure you hear the person correctly.
Saying something like, “You are suggesting that in the future I do X instead of Y” will let the person know that you understand his or her comments.
5. Explain what happened
Do not make excuses. However, if there were reason for the difficulty that truly were beyond your control, calmly give the details.
6. If you did mess up, accept responsibility
A simple acknowledgement, such as “I’m glad you pointed this out. I will make sure it doesn’t happen again”, can help to calm a negative situation.
Accept you make a mistake. Thank them for noticing your mistake.
7. Ask for more
Before the conversation is over, ask for more feedback. Asking “What else ?”
This will demonstrates that criticism is important for you. (If you believe that the person is just trashing on you, you may want to ignore this step).
Criticism may be something that we never like it but hey, we learn from many sources. Criticism is one of the sources.
Learn to handle criticism with positive attitude, so that it will not affect our brain health and emotion.
As I mention above, do not let criticism becoming a barrier as we moving further in career, family and life.