I am a former drug addict and this is my story.
When I was 17 years old, I had my first experience with prescription pills. My first pill was Xanax. It is known by other names such as, benzodiazepines, and alprazolam. In the streets, it is commonly referred to as “Bars”, “School Buses” or “Ladders”.
The addiction began during my college years. I was invited by a group of friends that attended the University of Texas in San Antonio, UTSA. I decided to take the trip the following weekend to join all of my friends. They were hanging out, having a great time, and indulging in prescription drugs, a pharm party. One of my friends asked me if I had ever tried Xanax. I told him I didn’t know what that was… He pulled out a bottle filled with small white pills. A small white pill, barely the size of a thumbtack- I didn’t think it would do any harm. It felt like I was walking on the moon, like I was on top of the world. I’m not going to lie; this pill made the music sound better, it made the food taste great. I wanted that feeling to last forever.
When I went back home after my trip to San Antonio, I knew I wanted that feeling again. I craved it. So I made phone calls to anyone and everyone in search of this small white pill, until I finally got a hold of some.
Once I got a hold of the pills in my hometown I started taking them like they were Skittles. Time was passing by quickly. Day turned into weeks and the weeks turned into months. Before long, the pill just wasn’t doing its job anymore. I wasn’t getting high off of it, like I did the first time. So I started to try other drugs- Hydrocodone, Ecstasy, Oxy Cotton, even Cocaine.
With the blink of an eye, this had become my life. I was selling pills and taking them. I had become an addict. This life was so fast, I was partying away all my days and nights and the money was good. The girls I began associating with loved everything about that life, so I thought nothing was wrong- no harm, no foul.
But I was going down a harmful path. People began to see me in a different light. My image went from the good kid persona to the bad boy image.
As time was going by with all the drugs i was taking i realized my life was falling apart, i dropped out of school. I was making trips to different cities to sell these drugs late night taking a big risk. I got arrested in 2010 for a pound of marijuana. i was getting exhausted. One morning in 2012 i said enough was enough so i reached out to my uncle for help. He moved me to San Antonio where he stayed and got me help but i would still take the pills because it wasn’t easy to just stop. i would go to the doctor then stop going, and get back on it. it was like a cycle i thought id never stop. I decided i was gonna stay in San Antonio until i would stop i kept fighting and fighting. My uncle got me a job at one of his stores at the gas station in downtown San Antonio to keep me busy. I was doing okay for a litle while then i saw a customer walk in with a bag of pharmacy meds, the drug addict that i was i asked him what he had in there, so he started naming all the different time of medicine(drugs) he had. I felt like i was in heaven again when he named all the “GOOD”. so i got some pills from him and got his number and started to pick up from him almost every other day. The price was to good to let go. One day i woke up and took 47 pills and overdosed and was rushed to the ER. I woke up and knew i f***d up. I went back to the doctor and started again but it still went on for another year. Until March 2 2015 i gave it another try by going to the doctor and this time i went with my pills and told him to throw it away. Ever since then i never touched a pill in my life. My life started to change. i would crave them but i kept fighting.. i put my focus in the Gym i would work out everyday. I went from a 215Lb to 174 Lean, my face changed people told me i look more alive and my words weren’t slurring. This battle was hard for me but i knew i had to stop for my family and most importantly for myself. Today I am 4 years 2 months clean all thanks to my uncle for not giving up on me… I remember when i woke up in the Hospital he was right next to me with my mom and my cousins and he asked my mom if he can leave to go get food. I felt like i had let him down so many times where that voice of him asking my mom if he can go eat. With all that being said today I get asked by a lot of people how i lost all this weight and they ask me if i can help. this feeling is what makes me keep going and i don’t ever look back.