It’s been a recurring theme I’ve seen with my clients recently.
“Oh I want to change, but I always seem to be doing this. Doing X makes me feel like Y, but then I think this and that…how do I know which voice to listen to? How do I know which thought to follow?”
Everyone wants a better relationship with their body, they want to change their behaviours, emotions and thoughts…but they aren’t willing to question their beliefs.
I get it. None of us want to admit that the beliefs we tell ourselves, subconsciously or not, that are the very foundation of our identity may not be true. Or not as solid as we once believed.
Say it with me, beliefs aren’t built on bedrocks.
Often beliefs we used to whole-heartedly believe in stop serving us as life changes around us. This is normal, because the life force of this world is fluid. It’s not the structured “go to school, go to uni, get a job, get married” story we were once told.
It’s expansive. Your life could become ANYTHING you want it to. The only thing that stops it is your beliefs.
In the same way, your beliefs stop you from building a better relationship with your body.
Trying to force your intuition – that voice that you WANT to follow along with – into a constrictive belief container does one of two things:
1. Shows you how that belief isn’t serving you
2. Causes you to repeat behaviour that leaves you questioning if your intuition is right (when in actual fact it’s not your intuition in the drivers seat).
What we CAN do is flip the belief on its head.
In everything you have ever done, you have used a belief to reason, justify or explain your actions. As that’s what you’ve put out into the world, that’s what you’ve received back. So it’s reinforced the belief and so the cycle continues…
If all your actions, thoughts and emotions boil down to “I am not enough” you’ll see patterns of perfectionism, workaholics and addiction kick in. Change the belief to “I am enough” however, and those behaviours eventually fall away because they don’t fuel the new belief.
If your belief is “I am not worthy of love” you’ll see toxic relationship patterns, problems with self-love including our relationships with food, exercise & body image and low self esteem. Change the belief to “I am worthy of love” and these behaviours no longer serve it.
What about “everything is so complicated and hard”? You’ll see overthinking, defensive aggression and excuse-creators. Change the belief to “everything is easy” and you’ll effortlessly develop new behaviours that reflect this over time.
When you can change the belief from constrictive to expansive (in line with intuition & life force), you can change the thought patterns, the emotions and the actions you associate with your physical body.
Then, your intuition will be able to move freely with your beliefs to create with you a body & a life that you can fall in love with again.