Ever been stuck in a rut filled with quicksand? The one where you lost your confidence or your hope and maybe even your self-esteem. You’re not sure what you want or what your goals are or how to get to the next chapter of your life, but you’re desperate to turn the page.
Next, you start becoming completely obsessed with your horoscope and check it compulsively for any sign that things will magically change. (Oh wait, that’s just me … oppps!)
Earlier this year, I was stuck in the waiting place and my BBF (shout out to Elizabeth Eiss) recommended an online course called “Succeed on Purpose” (all the gratitude!). I didn’t know what to expect and tbh I didn’t care – I was willing to try anything to change. And my gut told me that Terri Maxwell could help me. I was right and the 100 days that followed changed my outlook on life. I asked her 9 questions to help y’all get the long and short of what I learned:
1) What if I don’t know what I really want?
First, the more you want something, the more the soul knows that thing is on your path.
Second, you’ll feel both desire for it as well as fear.
Finally, when you really want something, you’ll find yourself a little more willing to face your fears, grow and possibly even take risks.
2) How do I overcome my current circumstances?
Where we are now is a product of what we were thinking last week, last month, and last year.
So in order to create something better, we first have to accept where we are, no matter how bad it is, and then focus all of our thoughts, and energy on what we want.
3) How do I get past the fear that I can’t create what I want?
Start by facing the fear. Most of the time we run, avoid or ignore our fears. That doesn’t work.
We have to stare fear down, and challenge it.
I use a process developed by Jenna Gabbilii and Eva Gregory called “What If Up?”
Rather than using my imagination to “what if down,” I turn it around and ask What If Up” questions. Like:
– What if it works?
– What if I actually create abundance?
– What if I find a way to love my life and make money?
4) How do I find self-worth; and know that I deserve better?
Self-worth isn’t some magical thing that only a few people are blessed with. Self-worth is a choice. We just have to learn how to CHOOSE to value ourselves. And we have to do this before anyone else will value us.
Self-worth is an inside game. It has nothing to do with what we have or what we do, or anything external. It’s 100% learning how to value ourselves.
I struggled with self-worth for the majority of my life. At some point, I got tired of trying to prove I was worthy, and just decided to find my worth.
For one whole year, every day…I made a list of 10 things I liked about myself. At first, it was hard, because I was so used to beating myself up. But with practice, I started to see my value and worth.
5) What if what I want requires me to change?
Our soul wants us to change. Our ego wants everything to stay the same.
So, if our desires come form our soul (and they do!) then guess what? Our desires will cause us to change.
Change is always good. It’s just that we don’t perceive it as so. Growth is there only way forward to a better life.
6) How can you recognize the difference between an inspired idea and impatience?
You can tell the difference between an inspired idea and impatience by how it feels inside your body.
Before I contrast the two, it’s important to understand that our ego does not like to wait and always needs to feel in control. So it doesn’t feel good to wait.
Acting out of impatience and doing anything to move forward FEELS better than the discomfort of letting go and trusting the flow of life.
That’s why we think we are taking an inspired next step because we are DOING something, and that feels better than remaining in the flow. The ego likes to think it’s in charge so taking any action appeased our ego.
When you recognize that you SHOULD feel discomfort than impatience has less power over you.
When impatience loses power over you, it’s easier to stop forcing life and start moving with the flow.
Inspired actions will now feel less like forcing and more like aligning.
7) If you don’t have time to take the course — what one small 28-day micro-change can you incorporate today that will make an impact?
Just focus every day on what you want. Spend the first 5-10 minutes every morning making a list of what you want to create that day, week or month.
Create a photo album on your phone and find pictures of places you want to visit or things you want. Add pictures of people, pets, nature – things you love. Loom at this photo album every day.
Anytime you feel afraid, pull your energy back into the present moment and look at that photo album.
8) If readers only remember one thing from this article — what’s the most important take away?
My grandfather taught me that “you get what you focus on.”
This story is one of the most memorable ones from my first book, and it’s very touching. He taught this to me at a time when my childhood was horrific and I never forgot his wisdom. I use it every day.
9) What’s up next for you?
I am preparing to launch the most exciting business of my entire life. Seriously. Even I am amazed how cool it is.
It’s an organization to support and teach conscious entrepreneurs how to start, grow and evolve businesses that make the world better.
There has been over a decade of debate now about the purpose of business. Should it be to enrich shareholders or serve stakeholders (communities, customers and employees)?
Entrepreneurs have been left out of this debate because we just focus on building businesses that serve customers and have to focus on our making our employees loved better – otherwise we don’t have a business!!
So…rather than advocating or legislating, we are collaborating and celebrating the POWER of entrepreneurship to just BE conscious in our little slice of the world.
Somehow you’ll escape all that waiting and staying, you’ll find the bright places where boom bands are playing!
Dr. Seuss
How to Escape the Waiting Place