We are social being. Our lives revolve around us and the relationship we made with other people, be it in our workplace, college, home, church or elsewhere and we are constantly connected. These connections and relationships with other people open new opportunities to learn new things each moment, but if we are not careful we will end up in the prison of their negative thoughts. We can’t control of what people think about but only our own. Below are simple steps you can follow to regain control instead of being a prisoner of what other people’s thoughts.

1. Be True To Yourself.

Believe it or not, you are one of a kind in this world. No matter to which corner of the world you go, you will never find anyone like that includes both your strength and weakness. Never compare yourself or wanting to change yourself to be like someone else just because others said so. Truth is, we may never know what’s on the other’s person shoes. Once you know who you are and what your values is, pleasing people will be significantly less important. Use your time to learn things and improve yourself for the better. Create growth list, do exercise and keep on learning.

2. Surround Yourself With Pros

If you keep feeding yourself with junk food or bad habits like smoking, you will find yourself in an unhealthy condition. If you feed yourself with healthy food and good habits like exercising, you will find yourself being healthy and energized throughout the day. Similarly, what we feed ourselves with is what we become. Stop saying negative words to yourself. If you have failed at something, instead of saying you are not good enough say that next time you will succeed. Cut out the negative sources and people from your life. Train yourself to wake every morning and say few positive words to yourself in front of the mirror and notice the difference.

3. You don’t have to constantly prove yourself

Some people deserve your silence. You don’t have to constantly waste your energy to prove to them that you are the exact opposite of what they think, instead use that time to improve yourself by learning things you didn’t know before and let your actions speak louder than your words. Remember, you have one life and it’s your own not others. Instead of reliving the comments, ignore them. Keep on doing what makes you happy and complete.

4. Let Criticism Build You, Not Define You

If you ask the opinion of 10 different people on one topic you will get 10 different opinions and thoughts. It is important to trust a select few to share their opinions with you and to discern who wants to build you or who wants to destroy your self confidence. Use their opinions to build yourself and not to define you. Use the criticism to help you learn more about what initially you didn’t know. Have a few close people you can confide in; people who you know have your best interest at heart.

5.Put yourself out there

After all said and done remember to always Get Up, Dress Up and Show Up. You can shut all the talks in one day and it may not even going to stop anytime soon but always know your worth. Go out there and do all things that can bring you joy. If you like writing, start a blog. If you like traveling, visit a nearby place for the weekend. Treat yourself every now and then. Learn to have fun with yourself.

Once you started doing all those above, there’s still chance they will notice the change in you and will increase their negative thoughts so don’t get discourage and be consistent. Remember, any negative comments they passed on you is not to define you but themselves. Keep on thriving.


Sares is founder and writer at Next Generation Digital Magazine, a social action & education platform that wants to solve the world’s biggest challenges.On our platform you can learn about issues, take action on what matters most and join a community committed to social change. To learn about our work, subscribe now

Originally published at journal.thriveglobal.com