Even though the loss of a loved one is a universal part of human existence, the
pain that comes with grief can be excruciating. It is something that we experience,
not just after the loss but throughout our whole lives in different phases.
The first thing to understand is that moving on after the loss of a loved one
doesn’t mean you aren’t going to miss them anymore. You will have your good
and bad days. It just means that you don’t allow your emotions to take control of
your entire self. Allow yourself to feel and still stay motivated in life to achieve
and have whatever it is you want.
Though there are five stages of grief, research suggests that you don’t need to go
through all of them. Instead of waiting back, if one stays in the right direction, you
can bounce back much sooner. With a little effort, you can use your pain and
emotions to take you towards hope instead of despair.
If you want to cope in the best way, here are some piece of advice
on how to start moving on after the loss of a loved one:
- Accept the grief and allow yourself to feel
The crucial step in moving on is to realize that feeling grief is mandatory. You had
a special bond with the lost person, and the loss of something beautiful comes
with emotions of pain. Even though time may have passed away, there are certain
days, birthdays, achievements, words said by others, that can trigger grief and
bring it back again.
To channelize your pain do something in the honour of their memory. Have a
celebration of life event, make their favourite dish, or write something. For
example, on your anniversary you can write down some heartfelt anniversary
wishes for husband and post them on social media. - Take support from loved ones
While wanting to stay alone with one grief is perfectly normal to do so but
complete isolation for long periods isn’t a healthy way of moving forward in life.
Reach out to people who care the most about you or people who will allow you to
be yourself. It can be a friend, confidant, sibling, or teacher.
There is a reason we live in a community allow your loved ones to be a part of
your healing journey will help you move on faster.
- Take care of yourself, No matter what
When we lose a loved one, both our mental and physical health aspects are
affected. It may seem easy to keep lying and indulging more in the sorrow.
Realize, that while some of this behaviour is acceptable but in long run, one needs
to start taking baby steps.
Know what your body and mind need to stay healthy. Eat, sleep, do exercises,
journal, talk to loved ones, and stay connected with oneself. The #SelfLove
movement becomes more important than ever. - Re-invest yourself in something meaningful
By channelizing your pain and re-investing yourself into something meaningful,
you can give back to yourself as well as society. It can either be in the lines of the
loss, such as sharing your experience through a blog, helping old people, and
volunteering in NGO’s, or it can be at a personal level, such as giving your best at
work and opening up a new business. - If you feel join support groups or take therapy
Reaching out to people who are going in the same phase of life as you are,
understanding them, and discussing them can give your emotions a chance to feel
acknowledged. Together you can grow out of it and start moving forward.
If you feel very overwhelmed consider taking the help of professionals through
therapy or counselling. There is a whole different study around the loss of a loved
one known as grief counselling. They will help you start your life in the right
direction.
Understandably, moving on after losing a loved one is not an easy process LJ. One
has to accept the reality, feel, adjust to the new environment without the lost
loved one, and deal with the social repercussions.
Just remember to love yourself and surround yourself with loving people and
positive mindsets. You need time to deal with your emotions and to start taking
those small steps which will eventually allow you to move forward in your life.
Have hope and faith, and remember that you have much happiness in store for
yourself!