For anyone under 45, it’s not what you’re earning, it’s not what you’re learning, it’s your access or not to the bank of mum and dad that is defining your opportunity. ~ Dr. Eliza Filby
As a psychotherapist in Santa Monica for the last 16 years, I have worked with many cash-poor millionaires; thus, I was particularly struck by Dr. Eliza Filby’s new book, “Inheritocracy,” because she explores the psychological consequences of being beneficiaries of our parents’ — inadvertent, mostly due to real estate purchases — paper wealth. This eye-opening book eviscerates the myth of meritocracy, revealing how inherited wealth, and not individual effort, has become the defining factor in shaping opportunities for millennials and Gen Z. Dr. Filby’s brilliant cultural analysis highlights how generational wealth transfer, what she calls the “Bank of Mum and Dad,” has reshaped the economic and psychological landscape of our society.
“Inheritocracy” is not just a study of perpetual and widening wealth inequality, but a reflection on how inheritance has redefined our putative meritocracy along with class identities and our ideas regarding personal autonomy. Combining poignant anecdotes, interviews, and insightful commentary, Dr. Filby forces us to confront uncomfortable truths about privilege. For those who still believe success is driven by putting your nose to the grindstone, this book will be earth-shattering. What matters most today is not what you know or earn, but who your parents are and where you are born.
Filby begins with a striking statistic: £5.5 trillion in property wealth will pass from baby boomers to millennials in the UK over the next two decades. This unprecedented generational transfer of wealth is creating what she calls an “inheritocracy,” where access to education, housing, and career opportunities is determined by parental support. Filby draws parallels to the 19th-century novels of Jane Austen and Charles Dickens noting that family wealth and inheritance have once again become pivotal to opportunities in life.
One of the book’s strengths is its exploration of the psychological impact of inherited wealth. While parental financial support offers clear advantages — less housing insecurity and greater career flexibility — it can also foster dependency and erode self-esteem. Filby’s interviewees often express guilt or inadequacy about relying on family resources, revealing the emotional toll of this dynamic. By examining these complexities, Filby highlights that inheritocracy is not just an economic phenomenon, but a psychological one.
Filby’s research is enriched by stories like that of Sarah, a 34-year-old marketing executive in London who received £100,000 from her parents to buy her first flat. While this financial boost spared her years of renting, it also came with conditions, like her parents reserving a bedroom in the flat for their visits. This story underscores Filby’s argument that inherited wealth, while advantageous, often compromises personal autonomy.
Dr. Filby draws on the works of economist Thomas Piketty and sociologist Peter Turchin: Piketty’s “Capital in the Twenty-First Century” offers a framework for understanding how inherited wealth perpetuates inequality; Piketty claims that when the rate of return on capital outpaces economic growth, inequality becomes more and more entrenched. Filby echoes this arguing that millennials benefiting from parental wealth are achieving homeownership and career stability not through talent and hard work, but through timing and circumstance.
In both the UK and the US, life chances are increasingly dictated by inherited wealth. In the UK, 80% of millennials are expected to inherit something and Londoners with parental help buy homes nearly five years earlier than their peers. In the US, zip codes often predict educational levels and lifetime earnings more accurately than any other factor.
Reading “Inheritocracy” has confirmed my suspicions about the dearth of actual Horatio Alger “rags to riches” narratives regarding archetypal American “self-made men.” Success today revolves more around inherited advantages than individual effort — many millennials didn’t just start on third base; they were sliding into home plate before they even knew the game had started. This sobering reality challenges our culture’s ideas about meritocracy and forces us to reconsider how wealth and opportunity are distributed. Through rigorous research, analysis and compelling storytelling, Dr. Filby ignites a crucial conversation about privilege, inequality, and the policies needed to remedy equality of opportunity in America and the UK in the 21st century.