I came across this poem, “Autobiography in 5 Chapters” by Portia Nelson and the profoundness of it resonated so much with me, I read it over and over again. Then I continued to ponder on it in my journal.

“I walk down the street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I fall in.
I am lost… I am helpless.
It isn’t my fault.
It takes forever to find a way out.

I walk down the same street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I pretend I don’t see it.
I fall in again.
I can’t believe I am in the same place.
But, it isn’t my fault.
It still takes me a long time to get out.

I walk down the same street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I see it is there.
I still fall in. It’s a habit.
My eyes are open.
I know where I am.
It is my fault. I get out immediately.

I walk down the same street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I walk around it.

I walk down another street.”

I reflected on the holes that I keep falling in and became aware of the holes in my thinking that create the holes in my business-and-life-sidewalk.

This is how we create the habits that keep us stuck and struggle to get out, only to fall in again. The habits of self-sabotage, fear, lack, debt, abusive relationships, ill-health, etc. The list goes on.

It’s true that the habits you have now will only get you what you are getting now. If you want to create something else, you need to do something else and more importantly, think differently.

If you want a prosperous business and life filled with abundance and all that is good, you have to create that, starting with a prosperous mindset that becomes your identity.

Only when we acknowledge that our circumstances are created through our own thinking and doing, can we unlock our power to consciously decide to create something else.

I realized that once again, it comes down to how we see ourselves. Of what and who we identify with and what we call this identity.

Your identity, how you see yourself, is the culmination of your thoughts, beliefs and meanings about you in relation to every aspect of your life. These thoughts, beliefs and meanings are reflected in the way you think and feel – your mind-body states.

Way of Being
The mind-body states that you experience most of the time, becomes your way of being. If this way of being feels good, then it will inspire you to achieve great things and become more and more the powerful being you really are. What’s more, you will choose streets with no holes in the sidewalks!

But, if your identity does not make you feel good, then it is up to you to recognize the holes in your thinking and habits, take responsibility for them and change them.

To change your identity and way of being, is to change your personality. When you change your beliefs you will change the way you respond to situations and make decisions. You will create new experiences that have positive results. You will change your habits.

Sometimes it can feel like you have two personalities competing to take over your mind and body. In actual fact, you have two ways of being competing for your attention. And herein lies the choice you continuously have to make.

The old way of being represents the victim in you who creates a life of fear and lack that has become so familiar that it has become your identity. Just like in the poem, it’s not your fault and you are a victim of your circumstances over which you have no control.

The new way of being represents the victor in you who creates a life of love and abundance that is so beautiful and yet it feels so unreal, so opposite to the life you are used you. If feels as if you are living in a bubble that is going to pop at any moment and will prove that this is just not meant for you. You don’t deserve the love and abundance and all that is good in life.

The Choice
Yes, it’s hard work to consistently choose your new way of being. It’s so much easier to just give up and surrender to the old-you and keep on struggling to receive the crumbs of life. At least you know what you have. The new-you feels like a fraud anyway. So it’s better not to have expectations or dreams of a better life. It is much safer and you have friends too who love you the way you are. Or so you ego-mind keeps telling you.

Let me just set the record straight. The intention or job of your ego-mind or subconscious-mind is to protect you and keep you safe in your comfort-zone. It perceives everything outside of your comfort zone as danger and will do anything to bring things back to normal.

The thing is, your subconscious-mind does not have a quality control system to know what is good or bad for you. It only works with what is. The quality control system is your self-awareness and your choice.

You choose to override the old-you and to become the new-you, creating a new life of everything you desire. To opt-out is a disservice to the magnificent being you really are. It is a slap in the face of your Higher Self as well as your Creator.

Here are 4 simple steps to integrate your new identity and way of being.

4 Easy Steps

  • Step 1 is to become aware that you have holes in your thinking that are creating unsatisfactory results in your business and life.
  • Step 2 is to take responsibility for the holes in your thinking and that will move you from victim to victor.
  • Step 3 is to choose what you want and who you need to become to achieve what you desire.
  • Step 4 is to train your brain to think and be different by creating a new mind-body experience of who you want to be while focusing on what you want. And to do so until your new way of being becomes the dominant personality and the old-you fades away.

You achieve this with practice, practice, practice. When you feel the old-you gains ground in competing for your attention, then remind yourself of why you want to become the best version of you.

So if you have any self-talk coming from the old-you, choose to ignore it and replace it with self-talk from the new-you.

Once you have tasted the bliss of what it feels like to live life as the new-you, you will never feel comfortable with the old-you again and happily choose new streets to explore!

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  • Dina Marais

    Business & Life Reinvention Coach

    Dina is a Business & Life Reinvention Coach and works with entrepreneurs and professionals to reinvent their business and life, live a stress-free lifestyle and make money in harmony with their heart, health and the Universe. Dina believes to BE the change you want to see in your business by mastering your mindset energy vibration and leverage your expertise to manifest your vision and business lifestyle. She has been involved in coaching and business for more than 16 years. Dina is a co-author with 19 other women world wide sharing their love journeys of trauma and triumph in the #1 International Best Seller Love Unboxed by Placida Acheru.