Oh….so now Taylor Swift and Katy Perry have decided to stop the name calling, backstabbing, and drama and end their long-time feud. At least that’s what the gossip rags are reporting. So Auntie started thinking, if these headline grabbing, media savvy celebs can “stop the madness,” well, then maybe we “everyday folk” can do it too. Although if you’re reading this, you’re really not everyday folk, but you know what Auntie means, right?

The question then is, “How do you let go of the anger, hurt, and disbelief” when someone picks a fight or feud? Especially when you’re a victim and the perp is arrogant, closed-minded, and just plain annoying. Not to mention wrong?

Auntie would always tell you to stand up for yourself, and never ever let someone accuse you of something you haven’t done. Never take a plea deal in your personal live. Auntie has had to walk away from people and groups that suddenly became poisonous, and advises that you do too. Unless, of course, they’re employing you or whatnot. In that case, do your psyche a favor and look for new employment. STAT!

But what about extending that proverbial olive branch? The power of forgiveness? Well, of course do that if it suits your temperament. But what to do if you’ve made peacemaking efforts only to be rebuffed? Honestly, Auntie wants you to immediately straighten that spine of yours. Do not grovel, do not beg, do not placate these bullies—you must immediately exit the situation. Save your self-esteem and go hang with people who appreciate you. And if the other party should ever have a change of heart, of course be the bigger soul and make amends.

Even after forgiveness and reconciliation, it might be advisable to know that this person or group abused you once, and you must never allow the abuse to occur again. Remember that adage, “once burned, twice shy” when dealing with these sort, and yes, by all means move on and live your fabulous life, with or without the questionable few.

Of course Auntie has a Helpful Hint just this situation, and here it is:

Auntie tries very hard to avoid selfish people, but alas and alack, they often seem to find their way into her world. The issue, my darling friend, is that the selfish seem to know who is anything but selfish. We must be vigilant, and fight the good fight, while never ever allowing their needs to overshadow our happiness.