Every time I see friends comment “I see from your social posts that you’re doing great and very busy“, I’m flattered and disappointed at the same time.
Shame on both of us. I admittedly only post brag-worthy stuff. Who doesn’t? My friends seemingly assume that’s my entire life status. We all do that, too. I feed the brand with acceptable online hype. They willfully buy it. It’s a huge contradiction when I tell audiences to not care so much what other people think. But in some ways, maybe it isn’t all bad.
As a public speaker, I earn my living by being inspirational and insightful. I get hired to give confidence. Therefore, I must be a role model and consistent show-woman. I need to be living proof that my stuff works – preach what I actually practice.
However, in between the post-worthy proclamations, I have my share of real doubt, frustration, and sadness. Somedays, it’s truly hard to confidently crusade. With that negativity, I feel like an imposter or a snake oil salesperson – telling only half the story and keeping my gloom off the grid. In those uninspired moments, I hunt for the other, positive half of what’s happening in my life that allows me to push forward and find my kickass confidence. It is not always easy – but it is always liberating.
Friendly flaunting is usually not with bad intention, but it is a form of bullying – deliberately or not making other people feel bad about themselves.
Don’t allow yourself to be that victim and then try your best not to belittle others with your own need to feel important. Me, too – I swear I try and it’s really hard – and, I admit that I often fail. But I keep trying and I am getting better at celebrating who I am only within my own head and not caring so much what others know or think about me.
Fake, stretched, or curated, our social posts rarely represent the whole truth. And while I don’t want to know what my friends ate for lunch, I do want to know when they are in pain and need some help or a hug. I just don’t normally expect to see that promoted in a public post.
We need to appreciate that life happens – to you, me, and everyone. Please remember when you read a picture-perfect post, it’s usually a snapshot of a fleeting positive moment in time that could be surrounded by a whole host of behind-the-scenes blah. Don’t assume more than that. It’s a single post, not a life. There is a real person behind that post. Someone that eats, sleeps, breathes, cries, smiles, suffers, and struggles – just like us.