Setbacks are an inevitable part of life. They happen to us both personally and professionally. No one is immune from them and nobody can escape them. The important thing to acknowledge about setbacks is that we must come up with a strategy for moving forward. We can’t get rid of them altogether, but we can move through them.
To that end, it can be helpful to name what actually happened during the setback, instead of making up our own story about it. Separate the facts from your interpretation of them. For example, the fact is that you lost a business opportunity. The story you might tell yourself is “I’m not good enough,” but you have to challenge that story because it’s exaggerated and unhelpful.
It’s also beneficial to shrink the setback. When you encounter a disappointment, your brain tends to zoom out and blow it out of proportion. Try to take a step back and zoom in instead. Ask yourself what specifically went wrong, and what portion of it was within your control. This helps make your failure less vague and enables you to work on solving the problem.
Additionally, it can be advantageous to take one useable lesson from the setback. What did you learn? Figure out about yourself? Your business? If you can answer those questions, the setback has some value for you.
The last thing that you want to avoid doing here is freezing. Take some action, even if it’s minor, towards improving the situation. Instead of starting over, just work on one piece of the scenario. Progress can help rebuild your confidence, much more so than getting stuck in your thoughts will. When you’re working towards any big goal, there will always be at least one dip or lull in the process. The people who succeed are the ones who don’t get stuck in those dips and valleys. They’re the ones who don’t misinterpret setbacks with exaggerated stories. They keep charging ahead.
It’s vital to become very hyper-aware of your self-talk. You must talk to yourself with respect. Be fair and constructive in your assessments, not overly soft or hard. Identify what went well and not so well. Focus on how you can improve in future situations. Remind yourself about your larger goal which is much more important. This practice can help anchor you in terms of the bigger picture and allow you to regain momentum, without getting stuck dwelling on your immediate disappointment.
Remember, we all encounter setbacks. They are part of the process. It’s how you handle them that sets apart those who triumph and those who do not. Be one who does!