My best friend doesn’t know that he is my best friend. He just thinks that we play squash once a week. We met a couple of years ago now – well I say met, my squash coach at the time asked him to play me. He was expecting a bit of a pushover on court but instead he got me – the angry bird with a mean back hand and lots to say. I’m not sure he had a choice about whether to carry on playing me at squash, I just expected him to keep turning up each week. And turn up he did in more ways than one.

We like to warm up before a game so our conversation starts in the gym. We have covered every topic known to mankind including those he would prefer not to. He has listened to my impressive, loud and angry rants – desperately trying to interject with rationale observations during a brief pause and generally failing. He has sat quietly next to me whilst I have sobbed with sadness and wailed with hormones. He has ducked when I have thrown my racquet across the court in temper and bounced of me whilst trying to get to a shot. He has held his hands up in defence after accidentally hitting me with his racquet, to protect himself from my wrath. He has taken my verbal abuse when he gets a ‘fluke’ shot (which happens a lot) and taken the ‘fifth’ if he wins and I’m not happy about it.

He often goes off after our game to think about the things that I am upset about so that he can offer better advice the next time round. He never minds if I mess him around with changing the time or day of games and always tries to make me see the best in everything. He has no idea of the level of support, kindness and wisdom that he has given me over the years, he vastly underestimates himself. His life hasn’t always been easy yet he is not resentful, angry or sad. He gets up each day and simply makes the best of it. 

He is the real deal, a genuinely authentic guy who is funny, kind and generous. He is my best friend but he just doesn’t know it.


  • Nik Davis

    Writer - Managing The Hell Out Of Life

    First and foremost I am a mother, home-maker and 'change maker'. I have a portfolio career, all underpinned by one core philosophy - to make life better, by empowering us all to be ourselves.    As James Victore says “Your purpose is to figure out who you are."    I am passionate about finding a way to help us all live a more sustainable life, I call this my ‘Third Way'. To help us re-define what success looks like, to live more authentic lives and to be our 'whole' selves.   "Your biggest fear is not spiders or sharks - it's you. It's the fear of expressing who you are - lest someone actually see you.“ James Victore   And that is where the real problem lies, if we do not allow our true selves to be seen, we will never lead the life that we are meant to. And that leaves us with something far worse than fear - regret.   So I feel the fear and do it anyway  - each and everyday by living my Third Way.   On a practical level that means:   1. Helping organisations achieve the 'seemingly impossible' and experience genuine transformation, driven by engaged and motivated people.    2. Showing up and owning up, sharing my stories and challenges honestly, via blogging and vlogging, to help others embrace theirs and be their true selves.    3. Helping individuals to rise, find their way forward through discovery sessions, a combination of coaching and consulting techniques.    4. Being a student of life, constantly learning about better ways to live our lives, both at work and play, to share that knowledge and to help create curious and empathetic leaders - which we all have the ability to be, regardless of gender, age, seniority, function or anything else for that matter.    5. Running an artisan fashion and design business, to encourage us all to be ourselves and at the same time, respect our planet by recycling and up cycling.    My career has two acts, before and after my break, which I took to focus on my children and recover from PND, but I also experienced grief, discovered what mortality really meant and learnt a lot about this mad this called life.   I practice the management philosophy 'Teal', brought to life beautifully by Frederick Laloux, I follow the work of Dave Trott, James Victore, Dan Pink, Corporate Rebels, Claude Silver, Gabrielle Bernstein, Mark Manson, Kathryn Mannix and Johan Hari, to name but a few. If they enable me to 'build on the shoulders of giants' and make the world a better place, I'm interested.   I’m an eccentric trying to make the most of my life and that of others, each and every day.   Nik x