Twenty-nine weeks was as far as I went in my triplet pregnancy. I developed a very low-grade fever and before I could process what was happening, I was in the operating room for an emergency C-section. It was scary and felt like one of the most chaotic moments in my life. There were so many people – medical staff who filled up the operating room and occupied the area outside of the room, as well.
When I didn’t hear my babies cry I felt like I couldn’t breathe in the silence that was so deafening it made me nauseous. I felt the tears falling from my eyes down into my ears. Since I was lying flat on my back the tears never rolled down my cheeks.
According to the CDC, in 2018, 1 in 10 babies were born prematurely. Honestly, I expected my pregnancy to end prematurely since I was carrying triplets. I just had no idea they’d arrive at just twenty-nine weeks.
My life changed when I thought my children might die. The strength, courage, and tenacity that I found as an advocate for my children are the greatest gifts. Most people don’t want to feel vulnerable. I understand! I also enjoy being in control and having power of my future.
When my children were fighting for their lives, I had no power and it was difficult to not feel hopeless. Soon, I was depending on strangers to keep my children alive. I learned that people need people. We can’t do everything. And, we’re not qualified to do everything!
If something happens in life that shakes you to the core, let it happen. Don’t fight it. Feel all the things, cry all the tears, and know that you will discover new strengths you’ve never had to call up before. We have get through our obstacles before we can get beyond them.
Be willing to ask for help. You’re not alone. There are allies all around you and it’s okay to be vulnerable.