At this moment in my life, I think there isn’t any reason why I shouldn’t be a sage. That I’m still relatively young (I’m just 46) as some would think, shouldn’t be a reason to deny me this most befitting appellation. But with the title or not, the fact remains the same: I’ve seen, gone through and survived a lot. And a big lesson I’ve learnt is never not to allow my heart rule my head again.

I want to start from my secondary school days. I was an average student who was loved by virtually all his teachers and classmates. And why not? Academically, I was doing fine. Socially, I was in the front burner. But there was a problem. My parents were poor, so they couldn’t afford to adequately finance my education. This meant I couldn’t pursue a university education after leaving secondary school.

To put it simple, I got angry and left home hoping to hurt my father by so doing. What I didn’t know then was that I was hurting myself a million times more than I could have hurt any other person. The anger detrimentally beclouded my reasoning.

During this period, there was a time I was filled with some sort of volcanic anger. Directed at no one in particular, I was erupting wildly in every direction and, in the process, nearly assassinate my own future. I wasted a big chunk of my youth wondering in the labyrinth of life’s puzzle when ordinarily I was supposed to be enjoying the guidance and mentoring of those who’ve seen it all. When I was supposed to be cutting my professional teeth and sharpening them. And what did I benefit from it at last except having my life spiralling like a mid-air deflated giant balloon. What’s the lesson? Rising above petty sentiments that send our hearts sprawling into splits is a task that everyone must embark on. Candidly speaking, human beings can be so petty.

From this particular experience, I’ve come to the conclusion that my head, and not my heart, should always rule. Feelings can be dangerously intoxicating, especially negative feelings. As a matter of fact, most decisions made while embittered are doomed to be disastrous.

Frankly speaking, there is hardly any negative feelings I have never felt before. And I think so it is for most people. So if they don’t commit suicide, if they don’t turn to crime; if they don’t give up, why should I?

Come on, just live life as it comes along. If the time comes along when you can conveniently pamper yourself, please don’t hesitate to do so. Eat what you like, but never eat unhealthily. Wear what you fancy, but never be extravagant. Nothing stops you from buying designer clothes or ordering FARUZO customised jewellery, if you can afford to. But be prepared, both mentally and physical, for tough times too.

On several occasions, I’ve had some nasty encounters with hunger. But there is a particular experience that impacted me extremely. I had gone without food for close to forty eight hours; practically two days of fast, willy-nilly. At a point in time, I became so tired and feeble that I could barely think. My mind was blank.

I felt the whole world must be wicked to let me starve. But hours later, it is the same ‘world’ I had blamed for my woes that came to my rescue. What a shame?

Nothing again will make me despair. Absolutely nothing. Past experiences have taught me that despair resolved nothing, if anything, it complicates matters. Remember the saying if life throw lemon at you, make lemonades? What I’m sure I can’t change, the next course of action is to find ways of living as minimally convenient as possible with it.

So why do I need it? Is it not a solution I need?

Though nothing is perfect, I think, to a great extent, I’ve learned to control my emotions. Some may say it comes with age. They are evidently wrong because we’ve got people of all ages committing suicide. The truth is we need to learn some things, and this is one of those things.