Life was beginning to feel like the screeching of nails on a blackboard that welled in the pit of my stomach. The to do list was growing faster than I could make lunches and action sixty seven emails that were growing by the hour.
I felt stretched spiritually, emotionally, mentally and physically. Right on schedule for a small, but nonetheless exhausting breakdown.
I knew I had to get away. I needed to slow it all down and reconnect to the joy in the simple moments, without a timeframe or agenda. To just be immersed in the moment of living.
It was a Friday evening and once the hurricane of dinner, bath and bed had calmed, I sat with a my favorite blend of herbal tea and began searching for mini break accommodation in the South West Wine Region here in Western Australia. Without hesitation, I booked the first one that popped up in the search. It suited my impulsive budget and was somewhere allowed dogs to tag along too, winning!
I’d pack in the morning and we would set off for two nights. It meant organizing our two cats to be fed. It meant the kids taking a mental health day off school, but they needed an energy shift in their world as much as I did.
The accommodation had space and beds for 9 guests. I dialed my sister’s number and as she answered, I blurted something along the lines of; “What are you and Carla (my niece) doing this weekend?” There was an awkward pause, followed by an “Um, I’m not sure yet…?” “Great! I’ve booked a holiday house and there’s room for you both and you just need to come and run away with us for the weekend!” It turned out that she didn’t need much persuasion. My sister took the hint and jumped in the car Sat morning to join our adventure!
The weekend was the exact medicine I needed! It was the medicine we all needed.
The kids all played in harmony and adored having their cousin to play with too.
But do you know the best thing about it? Two Moms!
Having an extra Mom intuitively sharing the mental load. Managing the jobs between the jobs, meant that our weekend flowed with such ease. It was remarkable how we worked together. Without even having to communicate, everything got done. We suspended in some enchanted mom portal. Everyone was fed, cleaned and entertained and no one felt wiped out at the end of the day.
That weekend affirmed what I have said for a long time; I need a wife!
In all seriousness though, as much as we laughed, high fived and blurted out ‘Two Moms!‘ like gangsters every time we intuitively smashed a domestic goal, it brought me into an even deeper sense of appreciation for moms.
Every day moms.
Carrying the mental load moms.
Never sitting downs moms.
Three steps ahead of the kids moms. Just how incredible we all are showing up every single day. Often without giving it a second thought.
‘It takes a village to raise a child.’ No truer words have ever been spoken, and I felt all of that.
I loved it. I reached a new depth of understanding for how much my nervous system craves community and load sharing. I have raised three children alone. Even during the time I was married, the kid’s father worked away on a mine site. Even now in an amazing relationship, for all intents and purposes I am still doing the solo navigation of the mental load alone.
Do we need to go back to community living? Do we need to get comfortable asking for help, instead of allowing life to overwhelm us? Do we need to start giving ourselves credit for the incredible job we do raising glorious human beings? We need a better way where everyone can flourish and thrive. Two Moms!