There are moments when we feel so lost that we just cannot imagine how to live the rest of our life. We feel numb and helpless and nothing has meaning.  In the first chapter of my book “The Soul Kit” – first aid for the soul, I write that it’s okay to feel down sometimes but don’t stay there. So, what can we do right away, when things are getting tough? Here are five tips which will help you feel better and start creating a more meaningful life:

  • Breathe

Every long breath is one small meditation and meditating is allowing the light into the darkness of our mind. Deep abdominal breathing creates full oxygen exchange and helps slow down the heartbeat and even stabilises the blood pressure. At the same time, it alleviates stress and calms us down. When we slouch, we don’t use the full capacity of our lungs and that’s why it’s important to sit up straight which, at the same time, makes us feel better and improves our confidence. Take a long breath in, hold it for a few seconds and then breathe out very slowly. Breathe in peace, breathe out anxiety, breathe in light, breathe out darkness etc.

  • Practice Gratitude

Gratitude is an immediate pain relief. When we concentrate on all the things that are going well instead of concentrating on the one thing that went wrong, we immediately feel more alive. Remembering, that if we have a roof over our head, food in the fridge and a little money in our pocket, we are better off than 8% of the world’s population puts things in perspective. When we are feeling grateful, the brain releases feel good hormones like dopamine and serotonin and helps us ease the pain. Writing down the things we are grateful for doubles the effect. Taking a gratitude walk and combining the practice of gratitude with exercise is my personal happiness cocktail.  

  • Change your thoughts

There’s nothing more troubling than our own thoughts, nothing has meaning until we give it meaning. We always have a choice how we want to react to something that happened. The wall looks a lot less high when we take a few steps away from it, the distance may even give us the courage to jump over it. Once we realize, that we are creating our reality and our life with our thoughts and therefore our emotions, helps us understand, how important it is to pay attention to our thoughts, knowing, that our future depends on them. The beliefs which limit us to reach our full potential are created by our thoughts.

  • Use positive affirmations       

Positive affirmations are shifting our thoughts from negative to positive. Practice self-compassion and tell yourself that you matter. When we use positive affirmations, we turn the negativity of our limiting beliefs into something achievable. Instead of saying for example: “I am not educated enough” say “I have come a long way, and I know that I can learn anything. I am in the process of educating myself even more and I know that all the knowledge of the world is available to me.” Always believe that everything is working out for your highest good.

  • Ask for help

We cannot do everything alone and asking for help is a sign of strength and not a sign of weakness. Two minds create more than one and when we are willing to listen to others, we can learn from everyone. There’s always a way and sometimes we don’t see it ourselves and need someone to point it out to us. We are here to lift each other up and shine our light for each other. Sometimes it just helps to call a friend or meet for that good old coffee, and sometimes we need help from a professional. Both are available to us and that’ something to be grateful for, isn’t it?

Author(s)

  • Elisabeth Villiger Toufexis

    Life Coach, NLP Practitioner, Author, Motivational Speaker

    I am the author of the book “The Soul Kit” and a Life Coach, NLP Practitioner and Motivational Speaker. My life purpose is to add value to people’s lives and brighten the path of those who are a little lost in the dark.  I am originally from Switzerland but live in Cyprus with my husband, and we have two grown up children. I speak 6 languages and also work as an interpreter. I found out very early in life that if we want to achieve something, we have to take action and not wait for someone else to do it for us. Life doesn't happen to us, we make it happen. I had a bit of a tough beginning, my mother was 16 years old when she gave birth to me and wanted to give me up for adoption, my grandfather insisted to take me home and I grew up with my grandparents but unfortunately when I was 10 years old, my grandfather died. I felt a lot of insecurity and shame and spent many years feeling quite lost and worth less than others but was determined to achieve something in my life. When I started understanding that we are in charge of our life and that it’s entirely up to us how we want to create it and that we must never allow our past to define our future, I started creating a wonderful life for myself. As a young woman, I worked as a tour guide in many different countries all over the world and learned about other cultures and mentalities, I learned that even though we may look different and speak different languages, we are all the same, with the same needs, wishes and dreams, and that we all have the need for safety and happiness. I have travelled to over a hundred countries, and I love to get to know people, appreciating similarities and respecting differences while bringing out the best in each other.