Back in the 1960’s, a Harvard University Lecturer By the name of Dr. Timothy Leary came up with the counterculture saying, “Turn on, tune in and drop out.” He, along with his students, were experimenting with psychedelics as a way to facilitate self-awareness and to interact harmoniously with the world around them. It was a time where peace and love was in the air and people interacted with family, friends, and folks who would become new friends.
For some time now I have been noticing the ubiquitous use of cell phones and other devices that seems to have so many of us “hypnotized” and unable to get away from them. Some have called it an “addiction.” Others say it’s a fear of missing out, and psychologists have said that it’s the “rush” of our brains being over stimulated. However, it’s not just the phones and the devices themselves that are problematic, but the accessories such as headphones, ear buds, and the speaker phone that adds to the problem. What problem you may be wondering? It’s the lack of social interaction, a sense of community, bonding with others, and a distancing of people from one another as they are self-absorbed and locked into their own little worlds. It’s like people are walking around like zombies transfixed on the content on their cell phones as they roam our sidewalks and our streets.
I belong to my community YMCA which has a wonderful administration, staff and membership which is great to be a part of. However, every time I go there to work out, there are people of all ages on their phones and they are not working out. They are sitting on the machines looking at their screens which disallow anyone else from using the machine. There may be some use of the weights, but immediately their phones are picked up and the scrolling begins again. I once tried to get the attention of someone on a machine with their phone and earbuds (it wasn’t easy) to ask them how many more sets they had before it could be my turn. It was very frustrating to hear “I have four more sets” knowing they are spending more time scrolling then lifting. There was once a rule that another person could “work in” on the same machine in between sets, but that rule seems to have gone by the wayside.
Another sad observation is to see a family out for dinner in a restaurant all on their phones scrolling without saying a word to one another. There used to be a time when families would go out and everyone at the table would be conversing and talking about what was going on in their lives or how delicious their dinner was. If this is what people are doing in public we know the same detachment and lack of family interaction is occurring at home as well.
People seem “mesmerized” while on their phones as they are crossing the street. People are looking down not up expecting the other guy to see them and stop. I remember once when I was crossing the street I saw a father who was on his cell phone go through a stop sign while looking down at his phone. His son, who was in the front seat, was also scrolling on his phone. Like father, like son.
Have you noticed that it seems like everyone is talking on the phone either while driving, walking down the street, or shopping in stores? The people who use the speaker on their phones, holding it up to their mouths like a slice of pizza, are arguably the worst offenders. It’s bad enough to hear a one way conversation when someone is using ear buds, but to hear both parties talking is just another level of rude.
Virtual therapy sessions also have a distancing and limiting affect between client and therapist. Prior to COVID it seemed the norm to get in your car and drive to see the therapist in their office. Technology has been developed so that a client does not have to leave their home to go to therapy. Convenient? Sure and perhaps many more people are getting help than ever before. However, looking at a two dimensional computer screen is not the same as sharing office space where one human can talk to another on a more intimate level.
Dating apps which are supposed to be used to make finding a partner easier have been reportedly a cause of great stress for a lot of people. It has been reported that people have become desensitized to online interactions because there is very little person-to-person experiences in real time. People complain about matching with another person only to see the match go away as quickly as it appeared. Someone likened dating apps to gambling or shopping. There are success stories out there, but it seems there are many more disappointments than real connections.
So do people really want to isolate from others and be in their own world or is it simply just a “side effect” of technology? Are people being “forced” by technology to be distanced from one another which will now be the new norm? There is no doubt that studies have shown that smart phones can have a deleterious effect on one’s physical and mental well-being. Conditions such as anxiety, depression, increased stress, loneliness, sleep deprivation, impaired relationships, poor grades, low self-esteem, poor concentration and creativity, and self-harm have all been attributed to over use of devices including social media. There is even a term for the fear of being without a mobile device – nomophobia.
With the lack of a real connection with another person, people are isolating more having interactions with others oftentimes only through technological devices. The devices keep people from actually sharing space in person. Social anxiety seems to be talked about more with some people reporting increased anxiety when they go out for dinner, hanging out with friends, or going to a social gathering or work events. We have become a society of people locked into their own worlds and shutting others out in the process. How can children learn social etiquette when not in the company of others?
So is there a solution?
Perhaps there should be a warning label on every phone and device stating, “Excessive use can diminish your capacity to have real interactions with others and will have deleterious effects by altering reality in the here and now.” Should restaurants, gyms, and other public places ban the use of cell phones in their businesses? Should schools teach children that over use of all devices and social media can be dangerous to one’s physical and mental health like alcohol and drugs? Would parents be in agreement with such restrictions and instruction even though they are “offenders” too? It’s already against the law to drive while scrolling and holding a cell phone. Should the laws be extended to other public areas? What are the sociological and psychological implications associated with excessive use of cell phones and other devices? And culturally, who is more at risk to develop serious health issues from this kind of electronic distancing amongst its populations? Some may find the dangers listed in this article to be overblown or excessive. Something is happening here right under our noses (literally) and one has to wonder what the future will look like. Will a dystopian society be the norm? And will anyone notice?