Yesterday I met with a new friend to have a picnic on the beach.
I was running a bit behind and didn’t want to be late for our first meet-up, so I run and pick up one of these bikes that you can use anywhere in Barcelona with a card.
When I arrived she was already there. We walked together so that I could return the bicycle.
Me: Do you have access to these bikes?
Her: I do have the card, but I never use it.
Me: why?. She then told me that she stopped using this service because once, she was in her dad’s car and a cyclist was not very prudent which could have lead to an accident.
She also mentioned how some of the cyclists go very fast at times which means that those who go slow are “on their way”.
I told her that I didn’t understand how she stopped cycling because other cyclists were imprudent. This has nothing to do with her.
Her answer was even more disconcerting. Yes but imagine how bad a driver could feel if they encounter an imprudent cyclist on their way and not being able to stop the car in time causing an accident.
My conclusion was that she was stopping herself from doing something that she might enjoy very much doing based on other people’s behaviours or for what could happen that hasn’t yet happened.
Sometimes we are so preoccupied with what others do and what can happen that we forget what we want.
This quality of thought I called it a “victim” one because it keeps you from doing what you really want and creating awesomeness in your life.
Of course, there is much to my friend than this. We had a vegan breakfast and this, in its own, was a significant change for her!
I chose to share the bike story because lots of us are stuck in these patterns and sometimes we don’t even notice them.
In my experience, ultimately, it is not about others and what they do but about us and how we can grow and expand in our lives to create a more enjoyable existence based on what we love and want.
I invite you right now to sit for a few minutes and reflect on what is what you love doing, what you want to do that you haven’t done it yet and take one SINGLE step closer to it… and if you dare, take a second one, and a third, and a fourth… until you reach it.