Open-mindedness– If you live in a box, you will be limited to the box. Your capabilities and your mind will only expand and comprehend within the limitation of the box. Being open-minded allows you to be more flexible and adaptable because you are open to new ideas, thoughts, and actions. This, in return, can result in finding creative techniques to face challenges and new methods to achieve success.
Resilience has been described as the ability to withstand adversity and bounce back from difficult life events. Times are not easy now. How do we develop greater resilience to withstand the challenges that keep being thrown at us? In this interview series, we are talking to mental health experts, authors, resilience experts, coaches, and business leaders who can talk about how we can develop greater resilience to improve our lives.
As a part of this series, I had the pleasure of interviewing Ruby Ali.
Ruby Ali is a trauma-informed functional dietitian, transformation coach and founder of Simply Supercharged. She helps entrepreneurs reach optimal health by healing the gut, balancing hormones, and building resilience to improve productivity, confidence, and success.
Thank you so much for joining us! Our readers would love to get to know you a bit better. Can you tell us a bit about your backstory?
Yes, absolutely! I am super grateful and honored to be here.
Since I was born, my life has been nothing but a rollercoaster of unfortunate events. My father first rejected me because I was a girl, and unfortunately, then separated from my mother for a few years. Then I endured various types of abuse, trauma, and illness.
As an aspiring young adult, I wanted to be a healer or a dancer. I know what a mix. It was the creative energy in me that longed to find freedom and purpose.
However, sometimes dreams are not an immediate possibility. Growing up in a single-parent home with two siblings and limited financial support, my mother asked me to join the cosmetologist school. My ten-plus years of profession taught me how much importance we place on surface-level issues and how often we ignore the inner world.
After a few years, I left home because I wanted more in my life. I longed for deeper truths, and part of me craved adventure, meaning, and love.
Through trial and error and constant health issues, I decided to change my profession to pursue a registered dietitian as a career.
However, a part of me still felt unsettled. Through healing my past and uncovering more about myself, I discovered that I am an empathic individual who can deeply feel other people’s suffering and pain. I started meditating at the age of 15, and I am gifted with wisdom, intuition, and a thirst for knowledge. I am creative at heart with a curious mind that loves to solve problems.
In my spare time, I lived to dance and learn. That was my vice to keep me busy. Because as a child and young adult, I never understood pain, but I felt it deep inside me.
It was not till later that I understood that dancing was my moving meditation, and music brought me peace and a way to release my pent-up emotions to connect with my innermost self. And healing others and seeing them flourish is my soul mission and purpose, and it’s what drives my motivation.
I consider true wellness is healing deeper parts of us at the root cause of imbalances in mind-body-spirit to bring about the transformation we seek.
Can you share with us the most interesting story from your career? Can you tell us what lessons or ‘take aways’ you learned from that?
The most interesting story about my career is breaking free from the past and finding what brings me joy while producing the most significant impact.
This ties back to my dream of becoming a healer because I discovered it piece by piece.
I knew what I wanted to be at a young age, 13 to be precise, but when you have suffered significant trauma in life and constant setbacks, you tend to stay busy and ignore your thoughts and emotions because they are too painful to endure.
A part of me wondered why this kept happening to me. I think many people can relate to this.
When I started my journey to become a registered dietitian, I had so many obstacles. Moving to a new state delayed my education because of financial reasons; my husband joined the military, which often required moving with short notice. This prevented me from sticking to a job long-term, so finding stability at those times felt like looking for a needle in a haystack.
However, the optimistic part of me was like, but wait; everything happens for a reason.
While pursuing my career, I unraveled that my trials and tribulations weren’t there to make things difficult for me. They were there to inform me of what I was not doing.
I learned that self-care is not selfish. It’s doing something for yourself without feeling guilt and shame. It could be as simple as reading a book. I grew up doing for others, so doing for myself was new territory. That was a light bulb moment.
It’s okay to have and allow an emotional release. I wish how to deal with emotions were taught in school as a subject. Because learning to express yourself and open up rather than bottling everything inside can have some grave ramifications. Emotions have a way of surfacing in many ways; some are anger, pain, or anxiety.
It’s not healthy to constantly judge yourself and compare yourself to others. This is such a destructive habit because it taints your self-image.
What do you think makes your company stand out? Can you share a story?
What makes Simply Supercharged unique is me, my experiences, and who the company serves–it’s for people looking for hope, ready to get down to the root cause to find freedom, health, and success.
Simply Supercharged is a solution-oriented company with carefully designed programs to get you results and end lifelong struggles rather than a resolution-oriented one.
Growing up, I was taught how to behave a certain way at home, school, college, and public. We all go through that chapter in life. However, I was not given a chance to be me. I didn’t even know what it was like to speak up and make my own decisions even into adulthood.
I remember the first time I used my voice to speak up about something I believed in–my entire body trembled. That was a major step I had taken in my growth. I found the courage and embraced feeling uncomfortable to get comfortable eventually.
I also learned how I hold emotions in my body, and it shows up as pain and dis-ease. Additionally, trauma can hijack your brain and nervous system, subconsciously driving and controlling your actions and reactions.
As I assessed all areas of my life and started creating goals that inspired me and brought me joy, I began to see the patterns, felt the freedom, and experienced the success that came with it.
Freedom, health, and success require one to embrace their individuality–no matter the past or the present–and nurture the parts they ignore. This is the road to healing and supercharged wellness.
None of us are able to achieve success without some help along the way. Is there a particular person who you are grateful towards who helped get you to where you are? Can you share a story?
I have been blessed with incredible people in my life that have served as a guide, motivation, and inspiration at different stages in life.
But the one person that left an imprint on me was during my high school.
Without this individual, I might have not made it as far as I did in my career and life. It’s my high school counselor.
During junior and high school, I endured additional abuse and trauma. I’m not the counselor was aware of the situation at home, but he was always there to encourage me. During my last year in high school, I felt so alone, lost, and hopeless. I was still doing everything but not with the same enthusiasm, and my grades were suffering.
One day, my counselor called me to his office, gave me a very positive speech, and enlightened me about how close I am to the finish line–my high school graduation.
To this day, I have not forgotten the kindness and encouragement that he provided, which I so desperately desired. I’m full of gratitude for the support of many people that helped me through when I needed it the most. I could not have had the same success today if I had never graduated high school, especially my chosen career path.
The second most helpful person in my life is my husband. He has believed in me when I have had doubts. He supports me and encourages me, no matter how I feel at the end of the day. I am very grateful for his love and his continued support in making Simply Supercharged a dream come true.
Ok thank you for all that. Now let’s shift to the main focus of this interview. We would like to explore and flesh out the trait of resilience. How would you define resilience? What do you believe are the characteristics or traits of resilient people?
I love analogies, so I’m going to start with one.
Resiliency is like an aspen tree, tall, strong, and can thrive for years to come. If we can be like an aspen tree, we will withstand all tests of time and life.
Aspen trees are beautiful, vibrant, and change color with the season. Most of all, aspen trees thrive in soils that are moist and rich in nutrients and love plenty of sunshine. I say that’s definitely what we need too.
Aspen trees are intolerant to shade and survive winter by allowing their leaves to twist and turn quickly to protect themselves–they can last up to 200 years. As soon as they get some light, they can create new sprouts and regenerate.
Can you see their adaptability and flexibility despite drastic changes? To me, that’s resilience.
People will come and go like the season, and life circumstances will change with highs and lows. But what withstands with you through all times is your mind, how you interpret your experiences, and how adaptable and flexible you remain.
Resilience is not letting the past rule your life. If you fall down, you get up and do it again, all without holding on to the past and not letting the conditions change your character negatively. Instead, you allow the experiences and challenges to become your teacher. And just like the aspen tree branches, you twist and turn to adapt to your unique situations.
The most valuable trait you possess is being open-minded, optimistic, and self-aware to be a resilient individual.
When you are open-minded, you welcome new possibilities. Instead of being resistant and staying stuck, you are not afraid to shed the old habits, patterns, and information that do not serve you anymore. You are open to asking for and getting help when needed. It’s pretty complicated to recognize the good when you place limits on yourself.
If you can learn to find the good in every situation despite the predicaments, you have already trained yourself for more positive experiences… that’s optimism. You will find things are more straightforward and flow more smoothly.
Self-awareness is the door to understanding the reasons behind your actions, reactions, behaviors, and emotions. Being self-aware allows you to experience yourself at another level, which is the key to success.
Courage is often likened to resilience. In your opinion how is courage both similar and different to resilience?
Courage and resilience do share a similar trait — action even with the fear present.
When you are courageous, you take action despite being fearful. When you are resilient, and an unfortunate event happens, you get up again and take action without fear getting in the way.
There can also be a notable difference between the two–courage and resilience.
Here is a good example. Let’s take a kind and generous individual. They have had many setbacks in life. They are known to be courageous and always the ones taking action despite being afraid. However, their behavior towards others has started to shift, including their character, which has changed.
So, when a person is brave but has become bitter because of his past. That means a part of him is still holding onto the past and is not letting go. They have not recovered mentally, physically, and emotionally.
If that same person is resilient, they take action, but they maintain their kindness towards others; their true nature remains intact and unaffected by their circumstances.
When you think of resilience, which person comes to mind? Can you explain why you chose that person?
This one feels like a tricky question. I have heard and seen so many inspirational stories in my life. However, as I think about this, there is only one person who comes to mind at this very moment.
The younger version of me! She suffered greatly but remained kind, loving, and nurturing despite everything.
I believe I chose her for many reasons, and I blamed her and judged her for too long. We can be full of guilt and embarrassment because we were hoping we would have made decisions at the adult level when we failed to recognize that we were just kids. Then we blame ourselves and hinder our own success. I did the same for years.
When you start working on your past, pay attention to how the different parts of you that show up in distinct circumstances are all just you doing your very best with the information present to you. You will see the strength and resilience and be in awe of yourself.
This was one of my many lessons. I had to learn to deeply love myself regardless of the choices I made in the past.
Chances are, when images and emotions arise, it is time to face them and let them go. It’s something we all need to be more conscious of, and this is the very reason I believe I chose my inner child.
I am perplexed by her strength and resiliency. She has grown and transformed into a beautiful individual who uses her experience and now helps others heal and achieve success. I could have never imagined and still can’t fully comprehend. But I know that she is an inspiration to me.
Our inner child is a part of us that needs love and nurturing, no matter the age. It’s the key to getting to know yourself and being fully present as yourself.
Has there ever been a time that someone told you something was impossible, but you did it anyway? Can you share the story with us?
Wow, yes. This was especially true during my teenage years because I greatly struggled to keep up.
When I was a teenager, living in an abusive house, living with a single parent, and with the added responsibility of taking care of my brothers, I felt unmotivated to complete anything.
This belief was embedded in my subconscious like glue and became one of the most significant limiting beliefs I had to work through.
I fought hard and made up my mind that I was going to complete, so I did. It took me 1 year longer to complete my cosmetologist program, and it felt like the greatest challenge of my life.
But I far exceeded my own goals and expectations. I am the first in my family to achieve higher education (a master’s degree and advanced training) and the first to start a business.
Did you have a time in your life where you had one of your greatest setbacks, but you bounced back from it stronger than ever? Can you share that story with us?
My most significant setback was soon after I graduated from my internship to finally take the exam and become a registered dietitian.
I thought now everything would be more straightforward and just flow. To my surprise, I didn’t land the job that I thought was my dream job because my timing was off by just a few weeks.
During my internship, I created my first Supercharged Wellness Guide and started working on my business. Today, that guide is one of the most popular guides with 9 simple steps to help you begin supercharging your day. Every. Day. This was my heart and soul.
The thought of starting my business did pass my mind; however, I was always taught that you always need a job and get more experience before you start anything yourself.
Since I was living away from my husband, I decided to just go back and figure out my next steps. After I went back home, I felt disappointed, and I also was burnt out. I was mentally, physically, and emotionally exhausted. I couldn’t stay up most days. Yes, even with all that, I still strived towards studying and getting ready to take a standardized exam.
I just completed very rigorous training. Instead of taking any time off, I continued to push myself to take the exam, which I failed on the first attempt. Now, this felt like another setback.
I decided to give myself a few months off and then revisit. Initially, I was disappointed, but then I reflected and understood that I was pushing myself way over the edge when I needed to first just rest and enjoy my accomplishments.
On the second attempt, I passed the exam. Then, as I started searching for opportunities, I realized there is nothing that brings me joy. I found that everything offered was not a complete system to get people results like I wanted to. I wanted to help people experience a transformation, and I simply wanted more for them.
When things don’t work out for you, they are opportunities in disguise for something greater to come. The unknown is also scary and mysterious, but if you wholeheartedly believe in what you have to offer and want to accomplish, the universe will conspire to make it happen with your devoted efforts.
So, I decided with much fear and no direction to start my own business. I’m the kind of person that if there is no opportunity for me, then I will create one.
Shortly after I started, COVID hit. Then, I felt like this was another setback. At this point, it was the mindset that needed to shift. I somehow still landed clients, but not to the extent I had hoped to run my business full-time. I also knew that I had never studied business in school, so I decided to spend my time learning about the business industry.
My setbacks helped me become a more robust version of myself.
How have you cultivated resilience throughout your life? Did you have any experiences growing up that have contributed to building your resiliency? Can you share a story?
My resilience in life was cultivated through my childhood mainly. As you have already read. I have had so many setbacks that nothing has changed me or my perseverance for reaching my goals. In fact, I believe I only dream bigger.
There are so many events in my life that have helped me develop resiliency; however, one particular one comes to mind.
During my teenage years, my family and I lived in shelters, and when we finally had a place to live, we often struggled to have food in the house. I don’t ever remember worrying, though. I spent my time taking care of my brothers and learned to appreciate when we had a place to stay or food to eat. I remember that we would receive donations from school. In fact, our first turkey for thanksgiving was a donation.
I believe that I have lived through the worse, and there is nothing that I can’t survive. That experience taught me gratitude and trust.
I am constantly reflecting, staying optimistic, and continually working on myself. I believe these are some essential habits to adapt to continue to improve resiliency.
Resilience is like a muscle that can be strengthened. In your opinion, what are 5 steps that someone can take to become more resilient? Please share a story or an example for each.
1. Nutrition– food is not just for survival. It is your ultimate tool for a healthy mind,
body, spirit, and action. With proper nutrition, you keep your body (the instrument) that serves you during all stages of life and season in the best shape possible. When you choose clean and nutritious food, you show appreciation to your body, and you stretch far with it to increase health, productivity, and success.
My lessons came the hard way. I grew up accustomed to eating a certain way, and
food was more of an emotional relationship rather than fuel to nourish and maintain good health. As I ventured into the world of science, energy, and food, I learned that food drives many mechanisms in our body, from thoughts, actions, emotions, and success.
Every cell in your body is made up of what you put in your body. Your cells respond to stress and unforeseen circumstances with signals greatly dependent on the type of food intake. Ultimately, food determines your body’s response, leading to specific thoughts, actions, and reactions.
2. Breathwork — Breath is life. It is your most vital life force and a major key player in changing your mental, physical, and spiritual well-being. Breathwork can help you alleviate emotional blockages that you can accumulate throughout the day. A simple practice can refine your body and train your muscles and nervous system to respond differently.
Breathworks have been used for centuries to heal and control many mechanisms of the body. A plethora of scientific evidence confirms that breath can be used to change your biology in a state of stress- in many cases, a few deep breaths can lower your stress hormone cortisol.
It’s the conscious control of the breath that does the magic. With controlled exhale and inhale, you can calm your nervous system and rewire your brain; therefore, increasing productivity and decision-making skills in your life daily.
Stress doesn’t always have to be instant — like running away from a tiger. There are
everyday stressors such as meeting deadlines, worrying about your loved ones, thinking about how far you are from where you want to be, or being concerned about your success. These stressors are the slow deteriorators often overlooked. Practicing breathwork will help you train your mind, body and build resiliency.
3. Meditation — Meditation is your mind-body-spirit medicine. During mediation, you shift your brain waves from beta to alpha. As you advance in your practice, you can achieve the theta brain waves, and finding inner peace becomes effortless. Stilling your mind can increase creativity, enhance performance, and decreases anxiety. You have to find a way to block out the noise to bring equilibrium to your day-to-day life.
At any given moment, the human brain processes 11 million bits of information per second. Our brain, to an extent, is similar to a computer. Imagine overloading your computer with so much information that it either shuts down or malfunctions. You get the point that is precisely what can happen to us.
That’s where meditation comes in. Many people struggle to relax, sleep, and find it difficult to get in the flow. What if you cut out the noise and learn to hack your own biology by just stilling your mind. Of course, this is easier than done, but this is possible with discipline and daily practice. Meditation expands your mind and makes it more resilient to stressors. You have to train your brain so that you can be in control.
4. Self-awareness — The purpose of self-awareness is to help you understand yourself — the reasoning behind your emotions, behaviors, and actions. If you cultivate self-awareness, you will become a better decision-maker, communicate clearly, and show up confidently.
We all have times when we make a decision and then instantly question our actions. Those moments what I call are small windows of opportunities for self-reflection. Ask yourself how you felt during this time, what emotions were lingering, and why I chose to say this. This may sound tedious but learning the why’s behind your actions helps you determine what drives you and the beliefs holding you back.
5. Open-mindedness– If you live in a box, you will be limited to the box. Your capabilities and your mind will only expand and comprehend within the limitation of the box. Being open-minded allows you to be more flexible and adaptable because you are open to new ideas, thoughts, and actions. This, in return, can result in finding creative techniques to face challenges and new methods to achieve success.
One of the most challenging things many people struggle with is asking for help. I did too. There comes a time that our expansion in life our business doesn’t happen without additional help. We all want to have increased productivity and success, which comes from sticking to your zone of genius and getting help in areas where you struggle. This only makes you a better leader.
You are a person of great influence. If you could inspire a movement that would bring the most amount of good to the most amount of people, what would that be? You never know what your idea can trigger. 🙂
If I had to inspire a movement today, it would be to stop giving your power away!
When we give our power to someone else, we lose direction, courage, confidence, and sanity. We have much in our control, yet we think we don’t or are molded that way. We are gifted with many abilities. Perhaps they are just not discovered yet or brought to your awareness.
When you use words like I can’t, but, this, but that, it’s not possible, you have already placed limitations on yourself. I have done that far too long and can still at times catch myself saying it. This lowers your vibration, and you lose the power that you have to actually change your situation.
Instead, use positive words and take control of your situation by staying in power!
Our experiences teach us that our capacity to survive major storms of life is enormous, and no matter what, we will and can come out stronger, braver, and more resilient than ever.
We are blessed that some very prominent leaders read this column. Is there a person in the world, or in the US with whom you would love to have a private breakfast or lunch with, and why? He or she might just see this, especially if we tag them 🙂
This is such a fantastic opportunity, and my list can be quite long as there are amazing people in the world who have supported me and inspired me.
First up is Tony Robbins. This exceptional individual has touched millions of lives and continues to be such an inspiration to all–including me. No amount of gratitude will ever surmount having the opportunity to have private breakfast with Tony Robbins.
Tony’s wisdom has guided me in my darkest and most needed hours, and I will continue to apply what he teaches. It’s like he is in my mind, I mean literally.
Another person that I admire and would love to have lunch with is Oprah Winfrey. Her determination has been so strong for so long; it is quite impressive to see her success and how she continues to motivate millions of women to find their true selves. Oprah, I would love to have tea with you and discuss everything about the self.
How can our readers further follow your work online?
You can find me at Simply Supercharged (www.simplysupercharged.com) or follow me on YouTube and Instagram (Instagram).
This was very inspiring. Thank you so much for joining us!