Rediscovering my self-confidence was a difficult journey, growing up and excelling and sports and school built a strong foundation for my self- confidence. It wasn’t until I was faced with major life changes that lead to impulsive decisions and bad habits. As a result, it started to impact my self-confidence. A lot of people are under the impression that self-confidence is some sort of magical jacket that somebody gives you just for showing up to an event. That event, of course, is called life.
I wish I could tell you that this thinking is absolutely spot on. Unfortunately, if I were to do that, I would be flat out lying to you. If I were to tell you that any of this is true, I would just be setting you up for a massive disappointment later on.
Life is not some sort of dinner party where respect, admiration, competence, and self-confidence are awarded as door prizes. It would be great if this were the case, but unfortunately, we live in reality. The reality is life is unfair. Life can be chaotic. Life, oftentimes, doesn’t have some sort of rhyme or reason.
We can cry about this, we can scream to the heavens that all of this is unfair, unwarranted and uncalled for, but let me tell you, if you do that, nothing will change. Life will go on. That is where I was at in 2018. At the beginning of 2018, I decided to make small changes to my daily morning and night routine, gradually building momentum and re-discovering my self-confidence
You really have a choice at this point. Either you’re going to have to take on life-based on its own terms, or you’re going to just crawl in your shell and hope that somehow, someway, the world conforms to how you wish it was. Which is it gonna be?
Let me tell you if you want to stay in this world and actually produce some kind of result during your stay, then you need to deal with the world as it is. One key aspect of this is to deal with problems and emotions. That is where I was in 2018, using distractions and short-term pleasures to cope with the stress of life.
A lot of people get so overwhelmed out about problems and challenges. It almost becomes debilitating. They think that it’s the end of the world if they confront some sort of challenge and it seems like the challenges don’t end.
In fact, some people have such romantic notions of how life should be fair that they’re completely blind sided by the fact that people can be mean and there are many unjust things happening in the world. One challenge after another completely crushes them. This really is too bad.
If you look at real self-confidence, and I’m talking about your perception of your ability to get things done, it’s paid for in terms of the problems you solve. That’s the bottom line. In other words, it is based on competence. It’s based on what you do. It’s based on the actions you take. That’s what the world pays attention to.
It definitely doesn’t pay attention to your feelings. Do yourself a big favor. Rediscover your self-confidence based on terms and based on a process that will leave you in a better position. Real self-confidence is no joke. Real self-confidence is something that nobody can take away from you because it’s not a product of your circumstances.