There is no question in my mind that life is nothing but one giant mind-game, and the sooner we master that game, the more successful, and happy, we will be.
We create our version of reality in our heads, then blaze a trail through life as if our reality IS reality. We live it because we actively believe it to be true.
With all facets of life, this seems to hold.
If I’m a fan of the Dallas Cowboys (I’m not), then they’ll probably be the best team in the NFL — at least to me. Or, if I drive around in a Dodge (I don’t), then Dodges will most likely be one of the best cars to drive. It’s our version of reality.
If I feel like I’m not good enough to try out for the high school baseball team, then it’s true. I’m not. If I don’t believe I could hack it working for that top-notch company, then it’s true. I couldn’t.
Those destructive beliefs become our reality, and the more we tell ourselves those things, the more apt we are to actually believe them.
Lie to yourself
Here’s the truth: There are a LOT of people in high places who probably aren’t “deserving” of their position. Aren’t smart enough. Don’t have the experience. But, they made it anyway.
Unless they are the product of nepotism or unethical favors, they made it because they believed they could. They played a different game in their head. Instead of assuming they weren’t qualified, they instead made themselves believe they were.
What would happen if we flipped the impostor syndrome on its head? Instead of assuming we aren’t qualified or deserving of success, how about we all make up our minds, today, that we ARE deserving of success? We’re qualified for anything. That author you’ve resisted reaching out to because you felt that you were “nobody” and they’d never respond? Yeah, fuck that.
Put that attitude behind you. Even if you have to lie to make yourself believe that you’re not a fraud, do it. Others have and they’ve managed to achieve some incredible goals. I mean, outrageously incredible.
What I’m trying to tell you here is quit shitting on yourself.
Think you aren’t qualified for that presentation in front of a set of high-level manager? Who says? They are just people. You’re a person, too. They might wear a suit to work every day, but that doesn’t mean you’re not as good at your job as they are at theirs.
If you believe you’re qualified, then you begin living that reality. Something magical flips in your brain and you begin to believe that you can and do belong among those managers. Your CEO.
Hell, the dang President.
Even if you have to lie to yourself to instill within you a belief of confidence, then lie. Lie your butt off. Lie like you’ve never lied before. Lie over and over again…as many times as necessary to get yourself to believe that you aren’t too dumb, or not important enough, or just can’t hack it.
Unlikely success stories
Before I leave you, check out this inspiring article by Entrepreneur about unlikely success stories.
Did you know that Arianna Huffington got rejected by more than 30 different publishers for her second book? It would have been super easy to make yourself believe you weren’t good enough with that kind of track record of so-called failure.
Bill Gates’s first company was a complete disaster.
George Steinbrenner (owner of the New York Yankees) drove a basketball team straight into the financial toilet back in the 1960s.
Oh, and get this: Walt Disney was told that he “lacked creativity” shortly before being fired from a newspaper.
Moral of this story? Never let society shape your opinion of you.
Feed on the hate. Ignore baseless criticism. Far too often, the only thing standing between us and incredible success is, well, our minds. Use the power of your mind to believe you belong.
If you believe it, it becomes the truth.
You are the only same size that matters
Try different things until you find something that works for you. Even if the experts claim another solution works better, keep doing what works for you. Keep perfecting it.
I’m reminded of that whole “getting up early” thing. “Experts” say that early risers are typically more successful than those who sleep late. As an early riser myself, I can flatly state that it’s worked for me. Getting up earlier in the morning has had a profoundly positive effect on my life.
But, that doesn’t mean it’ll have a similar effect on yours.
When it comes to you, YOU are the only sample size that truly matters. Do what works for you and forget about the rest. Forget about the experts. Pay no attention to the mess.
Does your mind play games with you? Have you flipped the tables yet?