What pleasure of living is possible that you have yet to enjoy? Are you ready to experience it?!
When you read the above questions what came up for you?
That – YES – there is more possible to enjoy and be pleasured by?
And – YES – I’m having it!
– OR –
That it isn’t possible until x, y, or z comes to pass?
That things are as good as they are going to get right now and your pleasure factor is maxed out?
Or that you can’t possible make that big of a leap as there are still some things currently causing you pain?
I mean – who is bold enough to jump from pain to pleasure, anyway – aren’t we skipping some steps?!
These are common can’t ‘s I hear often.
After all, they are drilled into us.
Most of what we are taught in life – not to mention self-improvement and development content – is focused on fix-its to take you from pain to no pain.
Identity the pebble in your shoe and remove it…
We are even taught that in marketing seminars… Find people’s “pain points” and offer them a way to get out of it.
Don’t have conversations on the possibilities of pleasure – that’s not relate-able and too big a stretch!
(this was a bummer for me when I first heard that – not that I had to follow suit but I was saddened that so many people fall into this perspective that most of mainstream marketing is set up to capitalize on it!)
Unfortunately, this learned formula for fixing our lives blinds us to the possibilities of pleasurable living that lie beyond that limiting mind set.
We end up seeking the middle ground of no pain like it is the end all be all – enough money to reach our set goals, no body pain, marginal change in our relationships, a slight uptick in the success of our businesses…
Most people unconsciously stop here. Once the pain is removed, the intensity dies down and we reach a level of comfort and breathing room we give up.
But what if there is more to life…
And what if seeking out the middle ground – aka mediocrity – is holding us back from the utter pleasure of a life well lived, loved and more expansive then we can possibly imagine?
Enjoy exploring these 3 simple steps to take you from pain / no pain to pleasure in each moment:
Use your body as the guide
Our life is really about the state of our embodiment; the way we experience, interact with and receive the elements that make up our living.
Our body health, our finances, our relationships – with others and ourselves – and our creative pursuits are all factors that greatly impact how we feel about and approach life.
You can use how your body and you feel as a simple guide post. It’s an effective way to check in with your current state – if you are in pain, no pain or pleasure.
It will also start to give you information about how each element in your life is impacting your pleasure factor – or lack thereof! This is a HUGE key in how to start guiding your daily choices and truly create change in your life experience.
Begin paying attention to your body signs and how you feel:
- around different people,
- when you look at your bank account or receive a bill in the mail,
- at work vs at home,
- when you are creating in your business,
- how you feel about yourself in those quiet moments that are free from mind numbing distractions.
This awareness and presence with self will serve you well in the next two steps…
Choose the next step beyond what would “fix” your problem
The formula we are taught is identify what’s causing the pain and find a way to alleviate it. This is effective to take you from pain to no pain but it doesn’t offer anything beyond that.
The next time you are going into fix-it mode stop yourself and instead ask – what pleasure is available beyond this? Leave it open-ended and let your mind wander.
Can you let the one “solution” you had thought of be just one of many possibilities and perhaps only a stepping stone to more enjoyment, a bigger life and more success than your solution could offer?
This step is more abstract – I get that – but it is a very creative one…
It allows you to begin to think and dream bigger.
Harness the power of gratitude
Next time you are stuck in pain and are seeking a way out or are bored and dulled by no pain ask – what is here to be enjoyed in this moment?
When we are focused on the issue at hand, that’s all we can see save for maybe one step beyond (most likely the rational solution).
While you check in with your body and how you are feeling (step 1 above) and allow yourself to dream bigger (step 2) become more present with what is here right now to be enjoyed.
When you are irritated, in pain or bored this may seem like a stretch. However, if you let yourself be stretched you will ALWAYS find something that you can be grateful for.
From there allow your focus to stay on that gratitude which inevitably grows into pleasure…
If you are irritated by someone in your life – ask what part of them can you enjoy and start to wonder how you can invite that part out more.
If you are stressed about money – ask what you can choose with the money you do have that will create more of a sense of abundance.
If your body is aching – ask what will pleasure it and do it.
If your business is stagnant – ask what would be fun FOR YOU to do with it and take action. (often our business pleasure takes a nose dive when our eyes are on our customers – not our creative joy)
Play with this and see… It amazing how fast things can change when you are willing to make the bigger leap.
Final notes
Truth be told you know there is more possible.
That you are capable of creating and having a more pleasurable life.
That there is more to life then just reaching goals – only being able to find pleasure once they are finally achieved or identifying and solving problems continuously.
And mostly that the path of life is made up of everyday experiences – and everyday pleasures – that add up to a life well lived and loved.
There is no time like now to begin…
For more information and inspiration on this topic, check out this episode of The Lighten Up Podcast with Lauren Polly on The Pleasure Factor