And start taking action…
How do you react to failed expectations or when something you wished for so hard didn’t pan out?
When your boss gives you a negative feedback, do you take responsibility or do you right away defend yourself by making up excuses?
- I didn’t have the right support
- I didn’t have the adequate budget
- I have too much going on at all times
- Everyone is always against me
- I didn’t have enough time
- I didn’t do it! It’s their fault!
Or at home when your partner points out to something you did or said that bothered them, do you acknowledge their feelings or do you right away go into attack mode and return the blame or start listing all the things that bother you about them?
Yep, excuses are amazing! They sure have a way to make us feel better about our shortcomings, our failures and insecurities. They even sometimes win us people’s affection or even create new allies who bond with us over the hate of a common enemy!
Excuses simply give us reasons to help explain why we’re just not good enough.
I’m sure we can all relate to that one way or another. Can’t we?
We have a way of standing in our own way and sabotage what could otherwise turn into a great opportunity. The fear of feeling bad and facing our own reflection trumps taking responsibility for things going awry. Our Ego and frail little hearts can’t survive the heat!
Let’s list some excuses we looove to use:
- I’m not good enough.
- People are mean and crazy.
- What if I fail? It would be the end.
- I’m too old. I’m too young.
- I’ve already tried and it just doesn’t work.
- They just don’t get me.
- The world is a terrible place.
- Only a very few can succeed.
- I was born in the wrong family.
- This is how I am and have always been.
- I don’t speak the language.
Do you realize that these excuses not only keep you stuck but they’ve also become self-fulfilling prophecy? They keep you small and alienated.
You basically are accepting defeat and endorsing it as if it were the only truth.
No one ever said it would be easy or pain free but changing your mindset and overcoming these challenges will definitely be more gratifying than sticking to your limited beliefs.
Never give up! Take the time to understand what went wrong and how you can do it differently. Be patient, be brave and be persistent.
Treat everything as an opportunity to learn and grow. Failure, adversity and setbacks can only lead to growth and development. The more you fail, the more you learn how to deal with it and how not to make the same mistakes again.
Remember, it’s all about taking small steps. Start small and work your way up. The more little successes you have the more empowered you’ll feel.
The only way to success is to stay in motion and always take action before you start thinking!
Ask for help, be proactive, take chances. What’s the worst that can happen? Your answer may not be half as bad as you imagined it being.
The worst that can happen is to reach the end of the road and look back with regrets.
Questions to think about…
- Can you think of some excuses you make or have made in the past?
- How have they impacted your life? And how did they hold you back?
- What excuses will you stop making? And how do you think they’ll impact your life?
Written by Ariane Tavakol