Take Off’, the Technique!
Couples, Take off together to a destination (if you are a single, you can go alone or with a good companion), preferably by a beach or a hill station. There are 9 steps to be strictly adhered for you to feel the results in this ‘take off plan’.
The 9 steps for a delightful ‘take off’ plan
Step 1, Select a place where neither of you know any one (so, you can leave your hair down, remove the mask of pretension & a chance to be for each other only).
Step 2, Leave your kids or dependants at place of your friend or relative (of course, you will repay the same services to them in future, for their take off!?)
Step 3, the take off should be a minimum for 4nights & 3 days, the best results are achieved if you can afford to 5 nights & 4 days (friend, we surely don’t object to longer than this).
Step 4; do not bother to see all the places listed out in your tour brochure. (That leads to rushing, for example in a hill station, you liked the lake fine spend more time holding hands there than to cover all locations, it is not sightseeing tour, it’s like another proper honey moon with Tapasya-Mitra’s, suggestions!)
Step 5, from the day you are in destination till the few hours before return travel, please avoid looking at the time. (Strictly no schedules- just let go! When you are hungry eat, when tired, sleep. Even the entertainment should be unorganized. Instead of group Yoga, try swimming. Or bike, maybe jog around the lake. But please avoid organized schedules.)
Step 6, (This step is for the couples only! not for the people going ‘with just a friend’) try to be romantic, hold hands, watch stars, walk in a same shawl, try a dance together (even inside the room is fine), try not to be on the idiot box (T.V). You can watch a movie of mutual choice, preferably cuddling together. Last but not the least ‘kiss’ each other more often.
Step7, every evening during the ‘Take off’ days, spend 15- 30 minutes in silence by yourself. Preferably looking at a scenic spot, observe the thoughts, do not control it. After the 15- 30 minutes make 2 journals.
Journal-1-Take a blank paper or a journal and write down all the happy moments of the past 3-4 months. It can be as simple as a note from a friend or a lovely message from your spouse or a beautiful smile from a child playing on the park.
Journal-2– Take your journal and write down all the happy moments you want in the next 3-4 months. Even quite a few can be a treat to you from yourself.
After the journals, read what you have written and add anything more!
Step 8, even before you leave on takeoff, sit together and make a pledge together that you both will not discuss future of your kids or self (because future is always a source of anxiety, even for bill gates! Believe me! ), no arguments of serious nature (if any, note it & come home & discuss- not at take off), no silly disciplines like keep the shoes in place etc, strictly no calorie calculation in a restaurant.
Step 9, no tour is complete, if it does not have the factor called ‘shopping’ in it. Did I hear, why? (Don’t you ever grow up?)
Try ‘take off’ twice a year, if you can- more than twice. It is compulsory for couple where both are employed. It does not mean you should avoid kids & dependants in the ‘Take Off’. It’s just that ‘save the boat, so, you can carry passengers and complete the journey too’. Take off, Live, Love & Re-invent!
Tapasya-Mitran takes this opportunity to thank psychiatrists, psychologists and social scientists who helped us design this program.
Benefits of this practice ‘Take off’
*Sure way to keep your marriage safe, with romance in it
*Sure to keep the sanity intact, despite the busy schedule
*Rekindle the spark in you, so the life remains beautiful
We all have heard it from our elders, family doctors & even we too suggested it to our friends. Yes, the travel, change of place, etc. We as doctors are always surprised about the swift recovery, we find in people, when they try change of place even for a few days. People with mental shock, situational stress like loss of loved one, unexpected disappointments etc, their immediate problems are blood pressure, sleep issues & anxiety, they very well comes to normalcy in a changed environment.
The modern day stress & strain can leave a person with no time for self. This is the hefty penalty on relationships, personal & official. The condition is worst and taxing on the couple, when both are working & it can be pathetic if the couples are not seriously committed in their personal life. This is the major reason for raise of divorce suits filed in family court recent years. This is also the reason for raise in cases of depression, anxiety, suicide, drug abuse, diabetes & young age heart problems.
For a good husband & wife relationship, communication, touch, sharing, laughing, assuring, romance are all required. When people are in a so called unavoidable, rat race of jobs, promotions, over time, personal pursuits, the thing first to get sacrificed is, ‘relationship’. It is not true in case of all the working couple, few are good in keeping both the side in balance. But most are not succeeding in it.
Many a times, just the absence of arguments & misunderstanding in a relationship itself is considered as great relationship or normal relationship. Is it so? No it is not the same. The strong & successful relationship is more than this, yes; the factor called ‘life’ is missing in it. The family psychologists around the world are pouring over this with concern. Even in ancient times the same problem was existing, but in much less proportion. This area of concern was discussed in Vedic period too.
We at Tapasya- Mitran (www.ityoga.com) too did quite a few research analyses on this area in the line of suggestions of world famous psychologists. The conclusions are put into a easy program and presented for your perusal. These suggestions are tried by hundreds of couple & have expressed their successful results, improved relationship, reduced arguments & more important factor, their rekindled fire of romance & love.
Dr.Dwarakanath [[email protected]]