How to use them to get back into the flow.

You’re in the zone, everything’s flowing and then all of the sudden, BAM! Things come to a pace that’s slower than a snail or worse, they come to a complete stop.

WTH?! What happened to the mojo?

It didn’t disappear never to be seen again. I promise. It just took a bit of a break.


All relationships ebb and flow. Each one has periods where things feel in sync and other times when they don’t.

If you’re an entrepreneur, you’ll definitely experience the ebb and flow where business is booming and then it slows down for a bit.

Even day-to-day life ebbs and flows. Some days we have more energy and some days we don’t.


It may not feel like it, but ebbs are a good thing. They provide us with the space and time to learn, to evolve, to reflect, and to gain energy.

And while it’s perfectly natural to want to do something to force the ebb to end, that’s often the worst thing we can do. I’ll explain what I mean using my own real life example.

There was a time when I would take the slowing down of my business personally. What was I doing wrong? Why wasn’t I gaining new clients?

I tried different things to get the business mojo flowing again…instead of trusting that what had worked prior to the ebb was still working.

As I result of trying to force my way out of the ebb I put content out into the world that wasn’t truly me, because it was rushed. I even lowered my already low rates in hopes that it would bring more clients in the door. Even worse, I disconnected from my purpose of why I became a coach. Instead my focus shifted and became about the number of people I was coaching. (Oh hell no!!! That wasn’t cool. My clients were & are people, not numbers!!) I drove myself nuts.

Self-deprecation hit an all time high because surely I wasn’t doing enough OR I wasn’t good enough. From the self-deprecation came even more desperation. (SIDE NOTE: Desperation is a repellant, which only serves to prolong the ebb.) I was trying too hard and the end result was no new business and lowered self-confidence.

It was ugly!!

Image courtesy of Unsplash

Now when the ebb hits, instead of allowing it to get ugly, I use the ebb to my advantage. The end result is a more creative, energized me which is a benefit to everyone, not just my business.


We can’t force the tide to come to the shoreline. The same is true with our own energy, creativity, connection, etc. BUT there are some things we can do when the ebb sets in… things that will help us to make it through, keeping our sanity and self-confidence intact.

Rest. Instead of forcing or pushing our way through the ebb, while I know it may feel counterintuitive, we can take the ebb as a time to rest and recharge our batteries. That equates to more energy for when the flow re-enters the scene.

Regroup. An ebb is a great time to gather ourselves together. Maybe we were running at breakneck speed prior to the ebb. Maybe self-deprecation has reached an all time high. We can use the ebb to get our own shit together so that our heads are going in the right direction.

Re-evaluate. An ebb is also an awesome time to take inventory…inventory of our relationships, life in general, our businesses and careers. What’s working? What’s not working that needs to be tweaked?

Working with the 3 Rs during an ebb helps us to leverage the ebb time and focus on something other than the ebb. Then before we know it the ebb becomes a distant memory.

Doesn’t that sound better than driving ourselves crazy nuts trying to get the ebb to end?

The next time you’re experiencing an ebb, imagine using the 3 Rs instead of force. No more self-deprecation. No more desperation. Just resting, regrouping and re-evaluating.

Sound impossible? It’s not. Give the 3 Rs a go and see what happens because at the end of the day, that ebb really has nothing on you!

Until next time, from my open-heart to yours…

Originally published at

Originally published at