We live in a world that’s pulling us in a million directions. But here’s the thing—what we choose to notice changes everything.
When I focus on what I notice, I’m happier, my relationships get stronger, and I actually perform better.
Whether I’m speaking to a packed arena or a small group, I always bring up this one truth: I used to think being a “multitasker” was my superpower. I wore it like a badge of honor, convinced it made me more productive, more efficient, more everything.
Then I learned about Dr. Amishi Jha’s research, and it hit me like a ton of bricks. Attention works like a flashlight—you only get ONE, and it can only shine on one thing at a time. Multitasking, I learned, is actually task switching, and it comes with costs—slowed progress, more mistakes, and emotional exhaustion. Even more, I was missing connections because I was too busy task-switching my way through life.
Now, I’m all about single-tasking. I’ll admit, I’m far from perfect, and there are times when multitasking feels unavoidable. Still, I try to protect certain times in the day for a few essential things:
- Savoring the Good: A walk outdoors, a good cup of coffee, music that energizes me—these moments become more meaningful when I notice and savor them.
- Getting into Flow: There’s something powerful about immersing fully in a task and allowing myself to get lost in the joy of creating and problem-solving.
- Connecting with Others: By being fully present, whether personally or professionally, I foster more meaningful connections.
Being intentional in noticing truly helps optimize my happiness, relationships, and performance.
Permission to Change
Another key idea I share during my talks is the importance of giving ourselves permission to change. Change is hard. It’s messy, uncomfortable, and let’s be real—it can be exhausting. But here’s the deal: giving yourself permission to change is the secret to real growth. It’s not about being ‘good enough.’ It’s about becoming even better. Small, consistent changes can lead to powerful growth.
It is easy to be hard on ourselves, often holding ourselves to impossibly high standards. By practicing self-compassion, we can continue to grow without the weight of unrealistic expectations.
Here’s a simple exercise to try: Think about something you can start or stop doing. What permission can you give yourself? Here are a few of my recent “permission slips”:
- To prioritize joy and focus on fun.
- To put my phone in focus mode and be fully present.
- To notice the good around me.
Take a moment to reflect. What permission would help you create space for growth, connection, or joy?
Option for Action: Creating Savoring Rituals
If you’d like to begin your own savoring ritual, check out my free Guided Gratitude Practices Booklet. It includes a step-by-step guide for bringing savoring into your busy life. Small steps like these can help us bring more joy and presence into our lives. Enjoy noticing.
With Bold Gratitude,
Lainie
Photo Credit: Julien Bachelet