A woman leaping on a beach at sunset

When was the last time you looked in the mirror and thought, ‘Wow, I look beautiful’?

I am willing to bet it was tied to some event or positive experience. Maybe someone you respect complimented you the night before, or perhaps you just got a promotion at work, or the person you’ve been pining over finally texted you back. Maybe it was your wedding day, or after a day of spending time with people you love, or after a great night’s sleep.

Whatever the situation, you likely felt beautiful long before you locked eyes with yourself in the mirror. You saw a beautiful reflection because you felt beautiful on the inside. 

If you think back, you may even remember seeing strangers smiling at you, complimenting you, or approaching you that day. The reason? I would be willing to bet it was because you were glowing. Really glowing, from the inside out.

And then a few days later, perhaps after a bit of stress trickled back in, a few sleepless nights maybe, or some bad news or disappointment, that beautiful face likely morphed back into something you consider less desirable. Just like that, your beauty seemingly evaporated, and panic likely set in.

If you are anything like me, this is where you start to hunt for serums, lipsticks, facials, or even cosmetic procedures that will bring that authentic glow back. You scroll your favorite blogs and magazines looking for your next beauty hit. You spend all your money on the ‘best’ products that so-and-so says all the celebrities are using. Then you wait – these things take time, right? You wait, and wait, and then POOF! There’s that beautiful face again.

Was it the new cleanser or sheet mask that brought back your beauty in an instant, or was it something entirely different? Could it be that some form of positive affirmation, a joyful day, or a great, nourishing sleep the night before played a part in bringing that glow back?

Here’s the thing, though beauty appears to be something we can attain from the outside, true beauty genuinely comes from within.

The pursuit of beauty isn’t just perfecting your exterior. When you feel anxious, stressed, sad, or tired, it’s going to show up on the outside, no matter how many facials you get, or how expensive your serum is. Make-up isn’t going to cover your mental unrest, and that inner turmoil has a sneaky little way of shining through to the surface.

So, why don’t any beauty product address this? Many of them do the opposite, by filling our minds with unhealthy ideals, sharing overly photoshopped images of ‘perfect faces’, only serving to dwindle our self-confidence further. There are some brands that do verbally share inspiring messages, but that only goes so far. Why don’t any beauty products provide real, tangible benefits to support our mental well-being; improving our moods, helping us manage stress, supporting quality sleep, and giving us a bit of energy in the morning, while also providing the exterior results?

The truth is, the missing ingredient in the beauty equation is our minds. Whether we like it or not, the seeds of beauty are rooted in our consciousness, and no matter how much we try to water those seeds on the outside, they won’t grow without planting them on the inside first.

They say beauty is in the eye of the beholder, but the truth is, beauty is in the eye of the ‘beholdee’, aka you. Beauty starts with you. So, in your pursuit of beauty, you do you, but don’t forget about also achieving a beautiful mind, along with working towards your surface goals. Attain your definition of beautiful by nourishing both your skin and your mind.

This doesn’t mean you should throw out all your surface solutions and become a monk. It doesn’t have to be one or the other. You don’t have to become someone you’re not to support your mental wellbeing, and there most definitely shouldn’t be shame attached to wanting to be gorgeous on the outside either!

Find your own recipe in your beauty equation, but don’t forget about that missing ingredient, because with real mental nourishment you might just be able to see that you already are stunningly beautiful, with or without all the extra fixings.


  • Ash DePass

    Cofounder & Mindcare Expert

    STUNN Collective

    Ash DePass is the cofounder of STUNN Collective, an emerging brand that exists to empower women with cutting-edge supplements, and mindcare training, to transform their skin and mindset, so they can defy toxic beauty standards and harness their own unique beauty and potential