Precursor: I did a live interview with my friend, Brittany Carbonne and we got to give two perspectives on self talk and the PROCESS in taking the narrative from negative to positive.

First of all, there are two different types of “self talkers” if you will – the ones who knowingly and consciously beat themselves up with phrases like, “No one wants to hear you talk,” and “You’re so fat,” and then there are the people who UNKNOWINGLY have negative self talk in the form of justification with phrases like, “Well, really, this is just how I am,” and “I wish I was smaller, but my body isn’t built to lose weight.”

Following me? Awesome.

Before I continue, all of THAT ^ is BS. It doesn’t matter who you are… If you are a living and breathing human, you can change yourself, internally and externally. Even if EVERYONE has told you otherwise. It’s simply not true. It’s a fictional story that you’ve convinced yourself is real.

Regardless of whatever self talker you are, you can use the following tools in your process to start turning down the negative voice, and turning up the positive.

  1. NOTICE the thoughts you think. This is HUGE, Britt and I both agree. Most people don’t even think about what they’re thinking about and you can’t change your physical and emotional state if you haven’t a clue what’s keeping you stuck in it, right?
  2. OPPOSITE ACTION to the thoughts. If you tell yourself you’re lazy constantly, you can easily prove yourself wrong by waking up earlier. If you tell yourself you’ll never lose weight, try to just lose ONE pound via eating healthier and exercising. You can’t positive BS your way into a better body, a better life, happiness, etc. You have to DO THE THINGS.
  3. DEFUSE the thoughts. I say this blanket phrase because there were two methods that Britt and I discussed.
Britt turned her negative thoughts into a fictional character that would come around blabbing that she could flick off your shoulder. This sounds silly if you’ve never tried it, but the idea is to DISCONNECT from your thoughts and this method allows you to do that.
The way I started to quiet the thoughts came from blocking them, physically. My worst area of self talk was at my body. When I recognized that, and after I had started taking opposite action, I didn’t give myself an opportunity to pick myself apart. I wore baggy clothes to the gym that covered my body because I KNEW the work I was putting in would pay off. I consciously chose to put my head down and work. And hey…. It worked 😉
  • 4. RINSE AND REPEAT. As humans, our minds NATURALLY tend toward the negative. You will never in your life have a flawlessly positive set of thoughts, BUT you can get better and quicker at defusing the negative ones. This is a PROCESS that must be REPEATED over and over. If you can commit to the process of embodying a positive outlook on yourself and your life, you WILL be able to achieve it.

Trust me. If Britt and I could bring ourselves out of our dark head spaces, so can you.