Over the years, the workforce became more inclusive. This means that there are more women and more colorful people, as well as more acceptance of what people call gender identity. Offices across the world are more of a melting pot. Get together with your staff is a nice thing. It can make your workday less bleak, help you focus more and make you more productive. But, your relationship with a friendly employee can be problematic if you do not keep it professional.
There are a lot of things you should not say that make a working relationship ugly or even dismiss – unprofessional, embarrassing or rude remarks and even annoying comments. In conversation, use a little common sense and discretion, especially when others are present. However, there are some embarrassing situations may have occurred. You may be in a position where you put your foot in your mouth and you do not know how to recover. Well, here are seven things you should never say to a female co-worker.
Did You Gain or Lose Weight?
The work environment requires a certain balance of grace and assertiveness in a situation like this. Staying at work is the key to success. When an employee is confronting a woman in the office with such a question, it can be difficult to know how to respond to it. If you see that a colleague has lost weight or has gained weight, say nothing. Her eating habits are none of your business and will probably make you very unsure.
Why Do You Always Look So Angry?
The drowsy face of some people seems a bit threatening or even mean. It’s just how they look. Mostly it does not really mean much. Women, who look angry, however, tend to hear many opinions about their countenances. A woman who looks serious or thoughtful should not touch you. Give your colleague a break and pay more attention to your job.
You Should Smile More
Many women often hear this statement if she does not have a pleasant face, “Why do not you smile?” There is an unspoken expectation that women should be happy at all times. This behavior is often spilled in the workplace. For example, one of my best friends she just had this problem at the law firm where she worked. Her supervisor told her that she would never become a partner when she stopped smiling. She did a good job, but the only complaint she got was that she did not smile. On the other hand, men are allowed to look serious and people rarely protest. If you notice a female employee who always looks strict, do not ask her to smile anymore. Just let her do her job and leave her alone.
You Should Wear More Makeup
Unless you’re working on a makeup counter, this comment is not appropriate. It’s up to your employer to decide how much (if any) makeup to wear. We hate to break you, but the women in your office are not just for your viewing pleasure. You need to make decisions, hold meetings, and handle business.
Knowing When You’re Stepping over the Line
You may be so focused on finding the answer to your question that you do not notice if you’ve gone too far with your request. It is best not to ask your colleague for a personal question. However, if your curiosity has gotten the most out of you, whatever you do, look for how your teammate responds to your question. Non-verbal hints, such as Eye retraction or tense body language is usually enough to tell you that you’ve crossed a line. As a rule of thumb, if the question is something you would not ask your boss, you may not want to ask your female colleague.
Comment on Her Appearance
Comments about a woman’s appearance are appropriate in the workplace unless you have a long-standing relationship and the comment is not misunderstood. Even compliments can backfire does that mean she looked less good yesterday or last month? You also have no idea what’s going on for her, maybe she is in training, and maybe she is sick. You do not know. So add that to your list of things men should never say to female coworkers.
Do You Really Want This Promotion?
There is still the unspoken belief that female workers will not be able to spend the same hours as a man. People assume that she cannot work more than 40 hours a week if she has a family or she has to keep her children, not working, as a priority. This is a fatal assessment error, especially for companies like Delkn that want to improve the gender diversity of their executive staff. Do not assume so quickly that an employee cannot or does not want to value a high-caliber managerial career because she has (or wants to) have children at home. In fact, a woman who at the same time can meet the requirements of leading a team with the responsibilities of a busy family life demonstrates extraordinary skills.
Changes in Status
Likewise, you should never ask a female coworker, “Do you want to keep working when you’re married, divorced, your husband/partner is moving, your husband/partner is retiring. They would not ask a man if he would like to continue working, if his family status changes, or if the status of his partner changes. But many bosses think it is perfectly appropriate for women to ask the same thing.
What Is Your Salary?
Money is a difficult topic in the best of times. To ask a colleague what he deserves is risky on two fronts: The question may be considered invasive, and the answer itself could cause trouble. After all, it is unlikely that you will see someone in the same way if you find that they are making twice as much as you.
Of course, there are occasions when a colleague is asked what is being paid. If they do the same job as you and you are concerned about discrimination, knowledge, the difference between you and other wages can be essential. In that case, set up your question and make it clear that you respect their decision if you do not want to share it. They have no right to their financial details, just as they have none.
Be More/Less Assertive
The self-assertion trap drives women crazy. Too much or too little, it is never quite right. If you find it appropriate to provide feedback, do so in a professional context. You are not their boss, (you are a coworker) so first, ask for their permission and use a constructive communication language.