This is an outcome of what someone challenged me to do.
And while I was at it, I realised how much our daily chores can impact who we are and vice versa. I can already see three independent topics in the last sentence.
Well, so the challenge was to write how I feel instead of what I think. I must say it was exhausting the first two days. I actually could not finally write. Because every time I started I ended up ‘thinking’ about ‘how i was feeling’! Strange as it may sound, it is true.
So one fine day when I had some peace to myself, I took a pen and a notebook and started. I ended up filling four pages. Since it had been a while that I had written instead of typing out everything, the handwriting transitioned from calm and beautiful to hurried and illegible (nearly). Yes, speed mismatch! But it was an experiential few minutes. So I have been willing to do that more often but guess need to try harder to make time for it.
Now this piece is not so much of a what I feel kind of page but it is inspired from that experience surely. I recently watched a movie ‘Dunkirk’. Yes I am confident that at least 50% of the readers must have already seen it or heard about it. For everyone else who has not, please do watch it. Highly recommended! So while it was an emotional whirlpool watching it, I realised there is so much of a ‘war scene’ that is a part of our everyday. Be it at work or at home.
We are constantly making choices. I sympathize with those who are not, because then everything going right or wrong (perspective again) is consciously or subconsciously being externalised. Correct me if i am wrong. More than happy to take up a neuron firing discussion! In the process of making choices, we are sometimes siding with emotions sometimes with pragmatism and in some blissful times both. In all this decision making, we are constantly listening to our sixth sense, our gut feeling. We can choose to ignore it, that’s a different thing. That is also something that the movie introduces the audience to. An old civilian’s learnings together with his gut feeling, a fighter plane pilot’s war with the enemy, with himself..
We are also compromising. Either in moments of weakness or for the bigger cause which is driven by love, passion, conviction. So on and so forth. Now I do not know whether it is a good thing or bad. There is no one single recipe for life. Every individual chooses to try their favourite version of it. But by and large, some more than others, compromise. I would love to find a better word.
When wounded soldiers were being served a slice of bread and tea, they appeared recharged even though it lasted for breathtakingly small moments. Recharge. Yes, that is the word someone recently reminded me of. A person I respect for wits and sharpness in seeing through bull shit. Monotony can last forever. And surprise us, by the vastness of time it can live for. It again is a matter of choice, but a recharge once in a while stirs up the soul. I have experienced the gloom and the joy of both. And would any day choose a recharge over ‘directionless’ monotony. This is not intended to be confused with routine. I would definitely brush my teeth everyday!
Well so you see how an inspiration from facing feelings has resulted in a thoughtful and hopefully a thought provoking write up!
If you see close enough with the bigger perspective in its background, trust me you will surprise yourself immensely!
Till next time..