Are you guilty of playing the blame game?

Blaming others, a set of circumstances or the world around you for why you aren’t where you thought you’d be? The truth is that there’s only one person in this world who can truly give you the things you want in life. You.

But to get there, you need accountabilty. To hold yourself accountable for perhaps the first time ever is at once not just empowered, but totally liberating. Once you’ve had the realisation that the buck stops with you, then all the excuse making for what had or hadn’t happened is irrelevant.

It’s so easy to blame everyone else for our problems without looking inward at what negative limiting beliefs or self-sabotaging habits are really to blame.

Different outlook

Now imagine if you were to put the same amount of effort for excuse-making into servicing your goals? Imagine how different life can be from now on if you were always conscious of those times when you were making excuses and just stopped yourself.

Don’t judge yourself, just simply ask yourself what you could do differently to get better results.

Taking responsibility means you allow yourself to be accountable.
If amazing stuff is happening, you are responsible for part of it or all of it. If challenging stuff is happening, you are responsible for that too. Being accountable puts you in the driving seat, and you get back ownership of your life.

Shift your focus

Ask yourself:

  • Is your glass half empty or half full?
  • Do you focus on the obstacles in your life instead of seeing the possibilities?

Shift your focus from the rear view mirror to the present, and you’ll notice how everything looks different. By focusing on the present, you can work on changing your reality. Focusing on past failures and disappointments creates a present of regret and unhappiness, and that’s disempowering. By focusing on what you can do now, you can align with the fantastic possibilities life has to offer you. Life knocks us all down at times. No-one escapes however blessed they may seem. The variable is how long we stay down before being able to bounce back from adversity.

So ask yourself:

  • What is my focus right now?
  • Am I focusing on something I want or am I focussing on something I don’t want?
  • Am I seeing the possibilities and opportunities or only the obstacles?

Listen to the stories you tell yourself

Take a moment to listen to your inner voice. You may be surprised how detrimental it is and how it puts you down. Find a new way of dealing with your disappointments that do not involve beating yourself up emotionally. Listen and be aware of the stories that you tell yourself. You may realise you’ve been living with a script in your mind for a long time. It could be a story about your self-worth or what failure says about you as a person but all of these are constructs, and they’re not real.

Becoming aware of your stories means you can let go of those negative judgements that have been running on auto-pilot. It can help you shift from a result-at-all costs focus to one where you relish the experience and learn to enjoy the moment more. Choose instead to refocus on the present and be accountable for how you can move forward. When you are accountable for your own life, everything changes from the way you talk to yourself about how you think and feel about yourself. Having this increased self-awareness means you can deal more effectively with any situation you find yourselves in.

The day you chose to be accountable for your own life is the day you take back control and step into a more empowered and satisfying role.

Most people believe that their emotions are beyond their control. However, where they focus their attention is their choice. It is also everyone’s choice in how they speak to themselves and the language they use. It is also everyone’s choice to be accountable and to take responsibility for their own happiness.