Do you want to learn how to take control of your life, change your victim attitude into a victor mentality, and avoid yourself from becoming a victim again?

I want you to be capable of taking your power back from whoever you have given it to by realizing where you stand with your thoughts.

I want you to feel strong and in control of your life so that you can live it more comfortably and happily according to your own choices. 

To become a victor we must first understand what it is to have a victim mentality.

A victim mentality or belief is a way to avoid taking any responsibility for yourself or your life – by believing that you have no power to take any action. It is when you blame your circumstances and people around you for your challenges that make your pain is justified. You blame someone or the other for everything that is wrong in your life; however, this is more in your head than in reality. You see only the negative effect of every challenging situation and not the positive. 

Most people with a victim mentality also live in denial of their mindset, they feel life is happening to them rather than they are driving their journey.

Let’s compare this to a Victor mentality – A victor mentality believes that you are in control of your life and you welcome challenges knowing that you can overcome them with hard work and persistence. A Victor leads life with confidence and success. The victim complains that life is unfair whereas a victor acknowledges life is unfair to everyone. A victim sees obstacles as problems, a victor can find the solution. 

If you often feel powerless, and afraid, and make excuses, you are in the victim zone.

You claim to be in the victim zone if you blame others, the world, and the conditions around you for your lack of motivation and achievement. If you feel powerless in the past and cheated, you are a victim.

I felt like a victim of my circumstances for thirteen years. I felt it was karma that I didn’t have the power to live my life on my terms. 

I felt like the victim of my past life, I felt a victim of my karma, I felt a victim of people around me. I believed life was happening to me and I couldn’t do anything about it, but that was because I was not aware and I was not doing anything to become aware. 

I believed my life was to live in pain, I believed it was my destiny to live an unfulfilled life. Imagine how horrible that was. I felt so powerless that I gave up on life. I didn’t know that by changing my mentality I will be able to change my life. Just because the situation and events in my life were not as per my expectations, I became a victim without realizing that challenges are a part of life and they will make us whom we are meant to be.

Once I became aware of the victim mentality I held, I started working very hard to reverse this and convert all victim mentality beliefs into victor mentality.

Even though we think we have no power we still have some power and with that power, we need to shift from being a victim to being a victor. 

3 learnings helped me move out of the victim mentality. 

1.     I learned to own my life – I started accepting responsibility for my past, present, and future. I took my power back by taking responsibility for my life. We have to learn to look past other people’s judgments, ideas and beliefs of our version of life to actually start living the life we want. So, take full responsibility for your life and become independent emotionally.

2.     Use your power – if you really want it, you must generate the power from within to achieve it. The power of action, the power of choice and the power to push forward. Start taking action towards your growth by creating new habits that serve you. Start making choices to shift your mentality and beliefs from within with positive self-talk and positive affirmations daily. And start making the effort to progress in the direction you wish by forgiving others and yourself.

 Be in a state of gratitude for all the blessings you have.

3.     Believe in Yourself – this can be achieved by converting fear to faith, believe that the universe is supporting you, and start fostering confidence by recognizing your strengths and being kind to yourself. View all challenges as growth opportunities rather than failures. Believe in and trust the process of life. 

In conclusion, free yourself from being controlled by what other people think about you. Start to prioritize how you feel about yourself, and what you want in life. 

Nothing changes if we don’t decide to change it; remember it is up to us to live the best version of our life every single day.

Pushing yourself to perform your best every single day will bring you the life you desire.

So, convert any victim mentality you hold in any area of your life to one of a Victor, because you are powerful to do so. 

Author(s)

  • Meher Mirchandani

    Director

    Manrre Logistics Fund

    An award-winning entrepreneur, healer, and coach, Meher is the Director of Manrre Logistics Fund and  Managing Director of Palmon Group. She is a maven who balances her various roles with equal ease and  persistent hard work—whether it is that of a business leader, decision maker, wife, daughter, or a devoted  mother to her twin daughters.   An inherently empathetic leader, she is a source of inspiration for her core team of leaders and leads by  focusing on conscious leadership based on her personal and her company’s values. As one of the Forbes top  Indian leaders, Meher believes that culture is the cornerstone of an organization, and she is responsible for  creating and building a culture with a growth mindset at Palmon and Manrre that empowers leaders to be  their best on all fronts of their lives.   Her leadership principle is “Success is something you attract by the person you become. It is your  dedication to consistently grow yourself that will yield you the life you desire.” Her personal journey has  brought about a breakthrough and transformation in her, which she shares in her first book ‘Come Alive’.  Come Alive addresses the answer to the question, ‘Are you truly Alive’?   Her book uncovers that there is nothing missing in life and that you are enough and limitless! It helps you  understand that you are complete. It sheds light on the fact that the relationship we have with ourselves is  what determines the quality of every other relationship in our life. Her journey concludes, that the feeling  of something missing is nothing else but the connection with ourself.  Through this book, the author guides you to know, nurture, appreciate, and fall in love with yourself.  Her five-phase process will lead you to prioritize yourself, love yourself and ultimately come alive. Being  alive is being in love with yourself for who you are.  Her mission is to evoke the transformation in you, so you honor and celebrate yourself for who you are! [email protected] www.mehermirchandani.com comealivewithmeher