First of all, why does this even matter?

There are a few reasons why finding your identity actually matters.

One is because when you become so lost that you don’t even know who you are anymore, you can end up depressed and having a breakdown like I did.

But, even if you aren’t at the lowest of low points like I was, knowing WHO you are improves all aspects of your life.

If you aren’t sure what I mean, ask yourself these questions:

Have you gotten to the point that you don’t even know who you are anymore?

Are you someone who is constantly busy doing #allthethings and wants to get back to the things that bring you joy?

Do you feel like you are constantly taking care of others, and it’s been so long since you’ve done something for YOU that you aren’t even sure what you do for fun anymore?

Are you looking to advance in your business or career, and you know that you need confidence and self-assurance in order to do so?

Maybe you have #lifegoals that have been put on hold for too long, and you are finally ready to take action?

You can’t give what you don’t have. And, you can’t know how to help others if you can’t help yourself. #amirite

Now, the “How?”

The “How” is actually simple. Not easy, but simple.

We have smaller purposes and bigger purposes.

Some of your small ones might be raising your kids. Helping a friend. Contributing to the success of the business that you work in.

But, then you have a bigger purpose.

I believe that somewhere in the infinite space and time, God said: “Who will go and stop the cycle of abuse and depression in this family?”

And I said, “I will go.” And, I went.

I suffered a lot as a child.

But I did it. I am a warrior. I went to battle, and I won.

And, I forever changed the trajectory of my families lives.

For generations, those in my family have dealt with addiction, alcoholism, depression, and abuse.

And, I stopped it.

Me. A woman. A petite, average, regular, normal, imperfect woman.

It’s done.

It will never touch my three daughters.

And not only that, I am now helping hundreds of other women overcome the very same thing.

So I stopped it in my own family. And, I stopped in others.

I don’t think it’s a coincidence that I ended up with three daughters. Because now I am teaching them how to live empowered.

So, what are you here for?

Use your deeper purpose to reconnect with your identity again. When you aren’t sure who you are anymore, figure out why you are really here.

When I started putting myself first again, without feeling guilty about it, I started seeing small changes in my life. Over time, those small changes became big changes.

Investing small chunks of time in myself is exactly how I found my deeper purpose and how I went from being out of shape, in bed, hopeless, depressed, feeling terrible about myself, unable to make a freaking decision, and on the verge of losing my marriage — to being in the best shape of my life, bringing in a steady income on my terms, having a marriage that is stronger than ever, living a life that I absolutely LOVE, and helping hundreds of moms do the same.

I’ve learned that, actually, we CAN have it all.

You are not average. You are a warrior. And, you are here for a reason. My story proves that yes the fuck you CAN.

PS — Have you taken the FREE 5-Day Brave & Bold Challenge yet? Your life is waiting.

Originally published at on April 24, 2017.

Originally published at