We’ve likely all heard that voice inside of us that cuts sharper than a middle school mean-girl, the voice that loves to say things to us like, “Yeah, right like they have that in your size!” or, “That would never work for you.”
The one phrase I see over and over again in my work as a success coach is, “Who do you think you are?”
That voice in our heads pops up for many of us when we are putting our work into the world in the position of an expert.
You may have heard her sharp lashings when you:
- Attempt to upload a podcast
- Put a video up on YouTube
- Publish a blog
- Launch an online program
- Produce an eBook
- Or, go on Facebook Live…
Unfortunately, these expert-level actions are the very thing you need to do to grow your business.
This voice often has ramblings of our childhood and can mirror things we heard from teachers, parents, and guardians. We may hear it say things like, “You’re getting too big for your britches!”
Often, my client’s tell me their “too busy” to do the core list of necessary Marketing activities for their business.
Recently, one of my clients was telling me about her very filled schedule, which absolutely couldn’t allow her to launch a new program.
Come to find out… after reviewing her schedule, we found she wasn’t actually busy, she was creating excuses because she was terrified to launch her new program. She was suffering from imposter syndrome and drowning in the mean-girl voice! She truly felt she’d be ‘found out’ and ridiculed for not being an expert in her field.
That couldn’t have been further from the truth! Her course was phenomenal and she really was gearing up to make an impact on the world.
Have you ever felt similar before or after putting your work into the world?
I think we all have.
It’s not logical, but our unconscious mind is digging into the history of our past and reviewing the times that we were hurt before. Whether it was something our parents said to us or a bullying incident in school, the message we are hearing is no longer relevant to the life we’re living now, but it’s still holding us back.
Until I began working on my hidden traumas in my unconscious mind, I couldn’t put my work out in the world without fear either! In fact, that’s one of the reasons I love coaching women in this arena today.
Once, I was working with one of the most qualified business coaches I’ve come across. She was getting amazing results with her clients, and she was making over $250,000 a year.
Come to find out, she had years’ worth of content, programs, and courses in her backlog she was afraid to release.
After a session together, we found out that she was deeply afraid if she put her work out, people would find out she was a fraud.
This, again, was so far from the truth! She knew her shit. But, her unconscious mind wanted to replay things that had happened between her and her dad to keep her ‘safe’.
This was the first time I really felt that if a woman THAT amazing and qualified, also had that mean-girl in her head…. None of us could trust the things we were hearing in our own minds, and all the ways we’re holding ourselves back because of it.
Now, let’s talk about you.
- What are some of the things this mean-girl voice is saying to you?
- How do you feel about putting videos, blogs, and programs into the world?
- Do you fear being ‘found out’ and being ridiculed?
- Are you holding back in areas of your business?
- Do you have unpublished content?
No matter what you may have answered, I want you to know – you are not alone.
Next time you hear this voice, there’s a simple exercise you can do. First, pause and take a deep breath. Next, repeat the phrase you heard in your mind out loud. For example, if you heard, “Jean is going to see this video and tell everyone I’m a fake.” You’d say that out loud, then ask yourself, “Can I absolutely know this is true?”
Most likely, the answer to that question will always be no.
The world needs your work, I promise you that. And, I’m here to support you! Come find me!